There is so much to write about this race. Over the weekend I ran Grindstone, which is a UTMB race from this year onward. It was their inaugural race, and in my “backyard,” because it was only two hours away from my home.
In brief, the race was a thrilling adventure. You could stop reading now. We had a storm. It was cold. I got to only halfway before taking the sag wagon back to the start. It is all worth it. I know the second half would be harder. I did not get to experience the severe sleep deprivation would bring while running. I did stay up to 6 pm to the second day, so about 36 hours without sleep. I can tell you, some rain puddles did turn into runners laying there when I looked at them. I slapped myself to stay awake. Yes holy bat-poop moments. I wonder how it would feel to stay up another 12 hours to the third day.
Yes, I ran part of the course many times. Hiked there as my first backpacking trip back in summer 2017. The course uses 75% of the Wild Oak Trail (TWOT), which I wrote about a lot because there was also a historic race (fairly old in ultra marathon history), the TWOT 100, which is an old school, “invitation” only and it requires an essay entry registration process for a selected dozen, to run where there won’t be aid stations, crowd cheering spectators, support crews, course markings, or buckle awards at the end. It is just you and the trail in either brutal “summer” heat or freezing winter cold.
Grindstone 100 is the opposite of any of the old school runs. It is a high marketing, corporate run and sponsored event. What you expect in a big city marathon is what you get from Grindstone (including food and candies that many people I know complained about, but we don’t talk about that), except for bathrooms out on the trail. It is a different feel than what I used to do with trail running.
Do we want to talk about the negative side or positive side first? There are probably a tons of negatives. A friend of mine said, he would not run it again. Not sure if it is this particular race or the whole UTMB style race. His reason was due to the food they provided. I found the food to be okay, but I heard the same from a few other people, even the volunteers complained about the food/drink they had because there were better options provided at other races. A friend told me they ran at other UTMB events, and this is the normal fare (candies and marathon-like nutrition). BYOB and food.
This leads to the second point: the race and experience is a little different from what we expect! Some I think are normal and some are not. There were a ton of “new runners” – first time running a 100 mile race. Well, not saying all of them did this, but I have noticed when you bring a ton of people together, they tend to “trash” the place. In trail running, we follow an unspoken rule like many (or all) backcountry hikers do of the “leave no trace” principle. It means no littering regardless whether at an aid station or on the course. And if you see some trash, I am not talking about baby diapers here, (which I did see), you pick it up, especially plastic gel or wrappers from trail bars we eat. They were clearly runner’s trash and recently left behind too. There were just too many. I ran the course maybe two weeks ago, they were not there. I ran many trail races and have never seen as many trashes left on the course as this one! I think it is the city marathon people, because in city races, we are “encourage” to throw cups down on the ground and volunteers would dispose of them. On trail runs, man, we don’t do that. It is ground for disqualification. And I only ran half of the way, and hopefully the other half is better. There was a heated discussion before about throwing organic matters on this course, like orange peels, if that is acceptable. The answer is no. The one who did it thinks it is acceptable because organic matters are biodegradable. But reason no is, it will become a trash dump once everybody does it. It takes away the enjoyment of runners who come behind them. Sorry, I had to get on my soap box.
Third negative, related to this is the attitude of some runners and their lack of preparation for a wilderness run. Yelling and get angry at volunteers is a big no-no for us, also another ground for banning from the race and/or disqualification. We should do it like in soccer or football, touching a race official is an immediate red card and ejection from the game. I couldn’t believe it happened. Well, unless it is baseball. I think it has to do with people not finding a ride back to camp and were grumpy (more below).
Sometimes, I think people just can’t have nice things. It seems to be coming from the city marathon running people, where they think they are entitled a full service out on the trail or maybe the high entry price they paid for the race. We don’t have “private” bathroom out there for once! Some have never use the woods before! My goodness. Yes there is no pot-a-johns even at an aid station. Go into the woods is what we do and “leave no trace”, I can’t stress enough. I saw TP and wipes on the trail. I have heard runners saying their wipes are biogradable. (The person is a male, so I am not pointing fingers at ladies — most if not all ultras are guys majority, females, they know how to take care themselves out in woods). Still, no, don’t do it. These were not there during my training runs. Sorry, I didn’t have enough gut to pick those up. Just gross. They looked recent too. Bring out your own waste is all I got to say. Put them in a ziplock, or double zip lock. Pack it in pack it out. At least burry them or put a rock on it so it wouldn’t fly away (I don’t advocate this, but at least, it is out of sight). Thank god we do have sweepers to sweep/clean up the course, but it is too much to expect them to clean up human waste and such. This is probably why we did not get permits to run on most National Parks.
We do have very good service from the volunteers at remote locations, but I read on social media after the race, that some runners were frustrated that were no “shuttle” available at every aid station to pick them up when they decided to drop or were cut from the race. Majority opinion seemed to side with the “victims.” Welcome to the reality of (ultra) trail running world. The whole ultra trail running is to be “on your own” and that includes when you bail from the race, it is up to you to safely get back to the start “on your own” or seek shelter and sometimes even on your own power — meaning walking back how ever long the distance is. I have done it. I ran halfway in an event before and did not make the cut, I chose to walk 13 plus miles back, with little to no support expected since the aid station had closed (at Catoctin 2023, and MMT 3rd training run of 2022). Note, I did it not because I was forced to, but I knew I could do it, you just take the shortest route back. Know your ability.
This is a tough love out there. A few were surprised they had to find their own rides when their bodies were cold and that they might lapse into unconsciousness. One raised the safety concern of being a young single female and had to share a ride in a stranger’s car. Comments were why there were no ride from the race provided (there were, but I think only at two locations and also time-bound, you had to get there by certain time or at least wait for a long time like couple hours or more before someone is available to drive). It is normal in other races to wait until the aid station closes before the volunteer’s shift ends (their shift typically goes from 4-8 hours or more) for them to give the person a ride back and some volunteers had clean up too, and it can take an hour or more, and most of the time, they also have to wait till the sweeper/last runner to come through before leaving the site, and this is usually an hour or more past the published closing time, so yes, prepare to stay on the course for a long time even after dropping (if a race is 36 hours, you better make sure you can stay 36 hours or more even if in the cold, well, especially in the cold). Tough love here. Ultra running is not like city marathon running. Basically, if you drop, you are screwed. I would be happy to have a ride at all if I drop from a race, much less complain about taking a rides from a family member of other runners. The issue was raised because a runner found out his wife’s car had full of mud inside from rides she offered. There are runners who wanted a ride but not willing to give rides to others too. They were caught again unprepared for ultra racing in bad weather. Not saying that their concerns are not valid, but just pointing out the unmet expectations some runners had. No one wants their cars to be dirty after a race, much less made by another stranger.
It is on them. It is a rude awakening for some less initiated. When I did my training run, I always make plans for backup — what if I can’t get to where I wanted to be — what do I do? You seek shelter if needed – because you have packed a space blanket or jacket and some other safety gear – you can survive, unless of course you didn’t have them! And you don’t run until you drop! Pay attention to your own health. I think some were caught off guard, especially by the weather. We all knew bad weather was coming, but how many did not expect to be wet and cold because of being under dressed, speaking at myself here. I knew I was going to be cold and still I was under-dressed.
That were some negatives I had not toward the race organization but my fellow runners. Unfortunate, many directed their frustration at the race. Maybe social media blew it out of porportion. It made me rant. Negative comments usually speak louder than many positive experiences we had. This brings to mind of the Toronto Marathon — boy was that fun, survival in a city center.
Now onto the more positive side. You have many good things from races by a famous organization. First it is glamorous! You get ranked globally! And if you reach 800 points you became an elite ultra runner! Second, the volunteers and supports are top notch (there were complaints too). You have course marshals, crossing guards, many signages, loud music and bright flashy lights that many have come to expect in a big city marathon. It was a very high energy atmosphere. Course marking was the best I have seen in an ultra race. You can’t get lost, period. Even on the trail! It was like trail running for dummies! Thinking about this, maybe because they gear toward this group of people, you get the complaints of not having bathrooms on the trails.
My only complaint was you do pay a lot from your wallet for all these frills and thrills. Some paid $600-1000 for this race, which is twice to 4x I normally paid. Ultras are not cheap, and famous ultras are even more expensive.
The race itself is not any easier. It kicked my butt. You think if you have paid that much, there would be someone to drive you around! Nope, you still have to run the course and it was not easy. I don’t think it was the lack of training, or the weather (we had a storm with a name, Ophelia, hitting during the race), or nutrition, etc.
Now why I did not finish. If anything, it was my lack of focus — and being lost track of time. I did have a pace chart made. Generally, I knew the pace and my time during the race and what I was doing. I had those information memorized. But I decided to run without a watch — I have done so for many races this year. It worked out fairly well except for this one. Yes, how can you run without a fancy Garmin sport watch or any watch at all? Exactly. I like to run by “feeling.” It makes me happy! No stress and all. Some of you think, that would drive one crazy of not knowing the distance/pace/time. Try it. I dare you. Double dare. It will free your soul.
Anyway, I think not having a watch was not a big issue. I had my phone on me. If anything I could check the time (and gps and map) from my phone. I just chose not to check as frequently unless I really needed to.
Back to the story, and I have to go back to maybe why I started running ultras. Maybe 2017-18? when one of friends in my running club did the JFK 50 (there is a post on this, here, about my first JFK run), I was so impressed by that and I said I will too run ultra marathons.
Of course, I did it in November 2019. 2020 came and I said, I want to run a 100 miler. Why? 1, I caught the ultra running bug. 2: maybe my main reason was Jen, who inspired me in the first place, if she ever attempts to run a 100 mile, I would crew/pace her. So I needed to run a 100 mile myself first. I don’t know why being able to run a 100 mile would qualify me to pace someone. Maybe that just the way it is. It became my motivation.
This of course was lost in the sand of time, until Grindstone. It all came back to me.
2021. I ran my first successful 100 at Rocky Raccoon, without a crew or pacer. Not that I didn’t need one, but I could not find one because I was too shy to ask.
2022. I had my first DNF (failed to finish) at MMT 100 and that opened my eyes that I need a crew/pacer or both for harder races. At the Devil Dog 100, I finally had my first race being crewed and what an effect it had on me. I said I am willing to crew and pace people, because they helped me in the race.
2022, also was when I met Tek at a race, who blew my mind. I think she ran like 22 100 mile races that year. I said, I have to step up my game. And I did. I signed up 3 or 4 100 mile races immediately. Blackbeard Teach’s Revenge, Massanutten, Grindstone, Burning River and possibly Devil Dog 100 were somewhat affected by this. All these races were within the past 12 months. I needed to run more and I can run more. Before I met Tek, I thought running more than one 100 was insane. As you know, I finished multiple of them (5 total), except for Burning River and Grindstone as I am about tell.
I went through this long digression, probably no one cares about to explain this, Sometimes you need to know why you run. It is the vision and mission for any race you do. And most assume that when you run you want to finish. That’s the prime directive. Grindstone flipped this up-side-down for me.
I trained a whole year for Grindstone. I signed up I think on January 1st or somewhere near that date and every since, every night before sleep, I knew I have this “difficult” race in September. And I would wake up each morning, all the runs I did, was for this one race.
I had expected to do well. I think I could. If I think I could not do it, I would not have stepped on the course or to be at the starting line.
It is a given: We all want to finish in a race. No one signs up a race and hope they would not finish.
I got myself a pacer, who is a wonderful friend of mine I met this summer at the Massanutten 100. He volunteered to pace me for 60+ miles. At the last moment, he got sick and switched to crewing for me instead. Shout out to him for being a great pacer and friend. I am forever grateful for him and many others who were wishing me well and supported me on the course or at home.
So here is the kicker, My purpose (mission statement) changed at the last moment before the race start. This is why mission statement should be written down and as well communicate clearly to others so that it wouldn’t be changed willy-nelly on the spot. But as I said, one reason I love running ultras is to be able to help others in their races even to the detriment of my own race (I had done this couple times such as at Iron Mountain in 2021 and 2022, and at Laurel Highland 2021).
In Grindstone, my mission was no longer to finish the race, but to help a friend to finish her race.
So here is the scope. As I was picking up my bib and taking it back to my car, for a final preparation since I had about 2 hours to spare before the race, I ran/bumped or encountered Tek, a friend who I haven’t seen in ages. Actually, I saw her at Old Dominion 100 the past June. I had no idea she was running Grindstone. She might had told me but I have completely forgotten. Memories rushed in. I promised to pace/crew her too back in 2022 too, but something happened that weekend and I never showed up at Grindstone. Suddenly, I felt a debt has to be paid.
We talked and caught up on things. When the race was about to start, she lined up next to me. I said, I would pace her through the night, since I expected her to be faster than me, she would be on her own the next day. Note, this ultra starts at 6 in the evening instead of morning, so you would have to spend two nights in the woods instead the usual one night. That what makes this race a tough cookie besides the terrain. Terrain and elevation are not as tough as the Massanutten 100 I just did. In theory, I had a good chance.
That is pretty much the end of the story. If my friend had finished, I would have finished too. However, she did not, and I followed her lead.
The first five miles were on the road with slight climbing. Everyone started strong. I was running a good pace. We hit the first aid station at Lick Run, at which the course became a gravel road and eventually led to a trail that took us up the mountain to a ridge.
When it goes up, oh it does. Many people started to slow down significantly. Tek was climbing hard but effortlessly and immediately was out of range (my sight). I dropped back to talk to a new friend, Hazel, who knows Lynn and Lynn knows Tek, all three were running this weekend.
First problem: After the climb, slower runners dropped back and faster runners sped ahead. Me, here, a slow runner, sped up too, except that my new headlamp was not working and evening was approaching. I used it at the Burning River, without a problem, but now it refused to turn on. It was locked in a flashing mode and I did not know how to get it out of it (later I found out, you have to press and hold for 30 seconds on one of three buttons in the back – I should use a marker to mark it — do not press that lock button, exactly, why would they made a lock button?). Anyway, I had to stop and get a spare headlamp from my hydration pack. Yes, always carry couple spares. I had two. That solved it. But my spare lamp was dim – normally I don’t mind it for city running, but on the trail, it does not do justice because I could not see rocks that blended in with their surrounding, especially black or brown rocks (moss covered). It was a recipe for disaster. That is also a reason to practice night trail running, so that your feet can run without seeing what you are stepping onto. Trust me. I did it, both the night trainings and the ability to balance without looking. Note, I could and do adjust the beam of my headlamp to shine farther ahead, so I do not look at my feet of where I am stepping while running. It would give you a natural running strides at night just like running in the day time. Of course you have to practice this. It is dangerous!
With the light problem solved, I could start running again. I caught up to Tek. Hazel was right behind me. We ran to Wolf Ridge, now maybe 12 miles in.
We were quick at the aid station, maybe only stayed for 2 minutes before getting back out. The next station was at the end of a long climb to the top called Reddish Knob (the 100k runners do not go all the way to Reddish Knob, fyi, they take a side trail that leads them to a road and from there New River Gap).
People say it is beautiful up at Reddish Knob but unfortunately it was night time and we had bad weather, so no sight seeing. We arrived maybe the back of the pack at midnight. Looking back, we were a bit slower than we should here of climbing these 9 miles up.
The next stop was to Little Bald, which was about 3 miles away with a slight uphill. Again we could have pressed harder here. Tek was falling asleep. I was too. She said she lost track of the time because she was afraid of getting lost, so spent a lot of time checking the map on her watch. I don’t assign blame here. If any, I should have taken charge on the pacing. However, because the race was still early, with 6 hours in and 30 hours to go, we didn’t want to be too aggressive with the pace. We always believe we could catch up later on.
Problem 2: Tek was having trouble eating. Tek is a nurse so I assumed she could take care of herself in term of meals. I was not too concern on this, but in ultras not being able to eat is a red flag, that things are about to get ugly. Indeed, it did. Reddish Knob did not have a lot of food, and they later ran out water was what I heard from Hazel, who were a few minutes (20-40 minutes) behind. They had about just two tables with some water coolers and some candies laid out. We know in ultras, not every aid station is huge. And not every station has enough water. I ran enough races to know. Some runners were caught off guard here. The station was dimly lit (maybe was unlit, and we used our headlamps to see.) I am not complaining, but just noting my experience.
Problem 3: We reached the next aid station, Little Bald, now past 1 am. Storm Ophelia hit. It started with some sprinkles of rain and winds were picking up. Temperature dropped, maybe in the 40s (about 7C). We were cold but could manage with a thin jacket on, since we were moving, and we did not feel too cold. Note, some people wanted to drop here, but were not allowed to (this is normal with ultra running, that not all aid stations allowed runners to quit).
Problem 4: Being cold compounded with the lack of sleep, and note that with 7 hours in the race now, and with little nutrition taken, at 25 mile mark, fatigue set in and the body started breaking down. Our pace slowed significantly.
Problem 5: Confusion set in. Remember what I wrote about not having a watch? We could not trust our GPS watch because the distance started messing up. Aid station at Little Bald said they are closing soon, but that they would be lenient to allow runners through. I think we were a bit behind pace, and we finally realized it. Tek asked how many miles to the next aid station, which was the New (or North) River Gap (NRG) and we all knew we had to reach there by 4 AM, and learned we were behind schedule.
Problem 6: We reached the first technical downhill. And this is a rather long descend. Wolf Ridge at mile 12 was technical, but not as much as here. Tek got a renew strength as panic of the impending cut loomed over our heads. We had less than 2 hours to get there. It seemed we might not make it or it would be cutting very closed. We had 7 or 8 miles to go.
Tek dashed down the hill. She was out of my sight. I had problem #7: which was my vision deteriorated due to rain and the fog on my glasses. There was actual fog as well. I needed windshield wipers and defroster for my glasses. Remember what I wrote about my headlamp, it was too dim to see. I tried wiping my glasses with my shirt, it did little to clear the condensation. Everything was wet. I then set my headlamp on its brightest setting (highbeam). It helped tremendously. I think it doubled the lumens. I started running confidently down the ridge, skipping on rocks, and dashing here and there.
Problem 8. This is a compound problem. We caught up a bunch of runners. We knew we were in good company, but good time does not last. Tek later said she rolled her ankle here and her pace again slow significantly again. The trail was rocky. I had no tapes on hand to tape her up even if I knew. I am not unfamiliar with ankle rolls, so I usually carry tapes, but not this time (I packed them in my drop bags). My left ankle just recently recovered enough from Burning River run. Tek’s ankle was swollen post race, when she showed them to me. She did not communicate this until after the race. (problem 9) and I did not ask, her reply when I did ask was the trail was rocky, but I have seen she could run rocky sections before. The main reason was she was injured. A good pacer should be well aware of their runner’s condition and give proper advices and guidances.
Our race was as well as over by then. I know I did not have to stay with her, however, I guess I overcommited. By luck or favorable blessing from above, we made it to New River in time with 20 mins to spare. I arrived maybe 5 minutes before Tek. I could get dry under the tent, though I did not have time in changing out my wet clothes. I thought we were about to head back out. In fact, I did not go for my drop bag. There were only two locations for drop bags, and here was the first one. It is critical to use them, because I had everything I needed in the bag! Problem 10, if I had a crew, they would get my drop bag, clean me up, feed me, and send me back out in no wasted time. Without a crew, we dallied. We did not leave until 3:50 AM as the station was about to close. Anyway, it would not make a different in hindsight if we had rush a bit, because we were 30 minutes over the clock at our later cutoff.
33 miles done so far. A 50k distance. I felt a bit tired by now.
Next, problem 11, or a missed opportunity and/mission creep. Initially, I told Tek, I can guarantee I could get her to New River Aid Station. I succeeded. But I broadened my scope saying I will get her to the morning. The next station was Lookout Mountain. They closed at 6 AM. We did arrive exactly at 6. This is a no drop location. They let us through. The missed opportunity was not taking care of Tek at New River Gap and let her drop there, so I could have continue with my race. I still had time to run my own race at that point. Mission creep, was I took on extra responsibility and being a captain to go down with the ship. If I needed to bail from my responsibility, New River Gap was a perfect place to do it. Bailing her at Lookout Mountain would have been a little heartless thing to do.
Problem 12 and 13. Recurrences old issues became a liability. Things started snowballing. Tek could not eat. She was throwing up the food she had eaten, which was a very bad sign. We could not drop her. Her ankle was bad. She was sleepy, but coffee would upset her stomach more. She could barely run. We were out of time. Day was dawning. If anything now was the perfect time to catch up on distance in the race, and speed our way to the next station, which is also a crew point, Dowells Draft, mile 45. I ran this section during training. It is very runnable. But I was screwed. My friend said, don’t let others take advantage of your kindness. I had expect to get there by 7-ish. We did not arrive until 8:30. Slow runners were passing us now. If anything, if you see a slow runner passing by during a marathon, it means you are in deep doodoo. We were moving slower than the slow runners.
Problem 14. I had a 50-50 chance that my crew would be at Dowells Draft. As I arrived, my crew was no where in sight. A little diappointed but my crew did not promise to be there in the morning. I told him, afternoon was when I needed him the most at mile 71-72, where I would likely decide to drop or go on, so he had decided to come there in the afternoon. Here though, I could help myself since I had a drop bag, (our second drop location) but because of the lack of time, I did not go for my drop bag to get warmer clothes or good food. The food at Dowells was excellent, but nothing beat your own that you had packed. I brought real food. If I were to finish, I need strong food, like rice and potatoes. There was also no cell signal to communicate with my crew, so that they would be aware of my delay.
Problem 15. Indecisiveness. Tek decided to drop. I decided to go on. Tek then followed me out. I tried to convince her to drop. We agreed, and I walked with her back to the aid station to hand in our bibs. However, I also believe I could reach the next one. The aid station captain also said, it is better to drop at the next location because they had shuttles there for us to take us back to the start, but there were none here. Tek was not convinced she could get to the next station in time, which was at Dry Branch with a cutoff at 11 AM. (Note: they should have made Dowells Draft station a hard cutoff station, instead of Dry Branch, or have Dry branch the place for our 2nd dropbag location). My reason for to drop at Dowells was my crew would show up eventually. I had dry clothes available for myself and Tek (Tek did not pack any, and we were wet and cold the moment we were not moving). We had less than 2.5 hours to get there. Tek believed she needed 3 hours. If we stay, my crew does not show up until 4 pm, and that is 8 hours away. 3 hours won. However, we could try too to beat the cut off. Tek said we lost so much time here, walking back and forth with our indecision. Indeed we did, though in the grand scheme, a few minutes here were nothing at the end. She said, in case we do reach the station and is missed by that couple minutes, we would kick ourselves of not getting out faster.
Nothing much happened now. It seemed we were doomed, 90% chance we would not finish. Even if I have left Tek and started running in earnest, it would be a foolish thing to do because it was a big giant climb for the next 13-15 miles to Elliot Knob. I don’t think I could survive the race at this point even if I put in full power. Sure, I might make the next station or even next few ones, but result would be the same.
Our only hope was to catch the shuttle at Dry Branch. Many people passed us. This was an out and back – lollipop loop of 27 miles, so the fast runners already finished the loop was heading back (inbounding) to Dowells Draft as we were outbounding. It was good to see them. I think we saw the first and second female coming in. For guys, probably were 10th to 20th place heading back. Then later many more. All these were sub 24 hour people. They would finish before dinner time, yet we were still less than halfway. I was not jealous. It actually boistered my spirit. I wanted to run the race as well as seeing the race. This was as close as it get to be along side with celebrities.
We did eventually reached our final aid station at Dry Branch. Mile 52. Some people do celebrate having run 52 miles. To me it was kind of deflated. I know people’s good intention to help me feel better. Keep eyes on the positives. We did it in 17.5 hours (almost half of the race 36 hour allowed). For those who were planning to run this race in an even split or a reverse split, then, they are deeply mistaken. We believed we could do a reverse split here or close to it. The next half had more road and we should be able to run faster. Also, it is day time, so we could see better and run better. However, 11 AM was the hard cutoff. We would have missed the cut anyway even if were did not have to deal with our tons of problems with our deeply held belief of doing an even/reverse split.
However, given the conditions, we had been out all night, wet, cold, having eaten very little food, taking the bus back to the start was a better choice. We did not argue with the aid station’s captain but gladly accepted the offer of the van ride. We considered ourselves fortunate to have a shuttle ready for us as we arrived and also being able to escape all the nastiness the storm later brought to the area. Thus our race concluded.
As they say there is always a next year. Many of the friends I knew, dropped from the race too. A few managed to finish. I spent the rest of the race, resting, recuperating, and enjoying the race. I headed out to Dowells Draft in the afternoon to look for my crew who did not know I quitted, because of no cell service in the area. Also I wanted to pick up my and Tek’s drop bags. At night after gotten some sleep, Tek and I went back out to see a few friends who were coming through at the New River Gap Station. My friend Wayne (my crew) cooked us a storm to eat, our first real meal of the day (well second meal for me as I smooched off Wayne’s food at Dowells Draft when I met up with him earlier)! He brought me the good storm not the bad one that was happening outside. He was crewing for two other runners. Becky, his remaining runner, came before the station closed at 1:30 AM. We stayed till past 2-2:30 AM. Here, some families were surprised that it was a hard cutoff station, at so “early” a time, since it was not mentioned in the handbook at 1:30 am. (Soft cutoffs are also a hard cutoff, though not communicate directly in the runner’s guide). (Hi Mel, a friend, who was upset by this, I didn’t know he was still on the course, and was later cut here at 2 AM because he believed he could still reach the finish in time, and the cutoff was too aggressive!) My advice: Always plan to beat the soft cutoffs or you be screwed. If I had continued running earlier, I would be cut here as well, because, my target was to get here around 2-2:30 am, like Mel. The aid captain finally kicked us out. We drove back to camp. Becky did manage to finish around 5 AM. She credited to Wayne for getting her through at mile 80-82, when the storm Ophelia was at its peak. It was as thrilling as being able to watch what she accomplished what we ourselves could not do. Intangibly, we felt in a sense of crossing that finish line with her as we watched her came in.
The weekend was Amazing. Some considered it a bitter sweet moment. I had no regrets. There always are what-ifs. Could I have run and finish in spite of the storm and hundreds of problems we faced? Maybe. We always believe we can. The moment we doubt ourselves is when we fail. Also, we accept our limitations. This was one of races we just could not finish. Someone told me, we tried our best in the circumstance given at this specific moment in time. We just have to accept it. Yes, there are things we could have done differently, but now it is water under the bridge and the ship has sailed.
At first it was difficult to write this post. Many wanted to know why and how I did not manage to finish. I seemed to be so strong, mentally and physically. I came into this race as prepared as I ever be. I still think I was unbreakable. The race did not break me like MMT or Iron mountain did or Burning River. In hindsight, I am more appreciative of my pacer there at the Burning River who similarly stayed with me through all my ups and downs (mostly downs) at the toughest part of the night. Maybe there is some wisdom in that. I thought about it, my purpose when I started the run was to help people and it gave me great joy. Even though with a DNF and I was satisfied. I am just returning the favor.
In awe 