In awe

I pride myself with planning. I usually over plan things.

Things start with a desire or an idea and I would go from there. This could be a vision or mission statement. Then you look at what is feasible. You break the problem down into smaller pieces and go again. Things usually falls in to places.

After my MMT race of last year, I am kind of rudderless. Big races for this year already decided by then. I had lost faith in myself. Could I still run a 100 mile race?

I signed up for the Devil Dog facing a decision whether to do a shorter version of 62 miles (100K) since I haven’t had a successful 100k run yet, or go with the big daddy the 100 miler.

By now looking back, 100 miler was the way to go. I signed up. Many friends came out to support and actively crew me. I did get across the finishing like with time left on the clock.

Rolling with it, I ran the Blackbeard’s Revenge, not having put much practice into it. Four months is too brief a training cycle. I spent the first couple months just to recover from the Devil Dog, then few more weeks of doing fake running of going through the motion, but training grind wasn’t there.

I finished way stronger than coming in and that was a good thing. I can’t afford another two months of down time since MMT of 2023 is a month away, May 19-21. A little over a month. 6 weeks maybe. I have written so much about it.

I did three training runs. The fourth is about to start tonight (by the time this is posted, it might be a week ago when my readers read this). I feel confident I could tackle this race if it is held today.

So the past few days, I have been twirling my thumbs, what should I run next. I already feel MMT is in the bag. I know I should not get ahead of myself before I even set foot on the course. My interest starts to wane. This is one reason I try not to run a race a second time. I feel like I have seen that done that mentality.

Anyway, I admit recently I hate planning. Because it is messy. Over the last three or four blog posts, I am circling around this topic of what I should do next and I always tell myself if I sleep on it, it would become clearer. Nope. I become more forgetful. I don’t remember what decisions I were suppose to make in my sleep! What was I suppose to be sleeping on? Panic.

Anyway, I looked at a few 100 races. New ideas keep forming. This is the messy part of planning when nothing is certain and things keep moving in and out of focus. I hate this. I wish I can say, this is where we are headed and go for it. shoot an azimuth and go.

I looked at the Ohio Burning River 100 and then I came across the midwest grand slam of four other races I can do, and I said to myself can I do a grand slam!? Crazy right? I started googling the places they are held and the time of year they are taking place and also how hard to get in and the sign up procedures. I got to say, they don’t make it easy! Half of the time the webpage assume you are a local and doesn’t give you the 5w and 1h (who, what, when, where, why, and how). The most important question is where and which state is it in! I wish every race would list the state first, like “Virginia – Devil Dog”. (By the say, Devil Dog’s info is spot on, I am only using them as an example, because I don’t want to point a finger at the race I am about to run). Anyway, I am ranting. I did get all my info. I wish they just standardize the five races websites or just make it into one webpage etc.

What am I saying? I am looking for races to run and I keep finding more and more races. Starting with Burning River, I found out about the Indiana 100. Today, youtube recommended me of Georgia Cruel Jewel 100 (106 miles). I also considering C&O Canal 100, Tunnel Hill 100, Daytona 100, Keys 100, Alabama Pihoti 100, Lousiana Red Dirt 100, Virginia Cloud Spitter 100, and Kansas Heartland 125. I would like to do Lake Tahoe too but their pacing (18 hrs for 72 miles) is a bit rough for me. RD mentioned they are willing to work with runners who need an earlier start. I might need 19-20 hours for that race.

As you see, I love to look at things comprehensively and study it in every possible angles. I might end up just throwing a dart and go from there. Cruel Jewel race kind of speaking to me at the moment. I like a hard race but also doable with 48 hours given. Eastern States, I feel I am still out of that league, 36 hours should be able for me, but then I might need 38-40 hours.

This is where I stand at the moment juggling about 8-10 races in my head. I want to do them all but I know, I have to narrow it down to two or three and that is unfortunate. I found I am miserable at making decisions.

I know it is always back to the central question what do I want to get out of it. I have been struggling this one issue since beginning of this year. I read back my several post, yes, I am exploring. More to come in a few months. If readers are lost, so am I.