Category: life

  • [696] Thankful for 2025

    Wow where did 2025 go?  Not long ago, I was writing resolutions for the new year, actually, I did not write one for 2025 but reused one I did not published from 2023 (part1). Now I will be doing again for 2026 soon and maybe also for 2027. They were goals I have been working on for the past few years.  They are still my current goals.

    It is challenging that I have not made much headway into them.  So same this year. 

    Why/why not?  I think I have too many things to focus.  Some were not explicitly stated.  Well they are distractions too, I got pull into many short term goals.  Or seriously, I need time to sit down and decide again what my real goals and priorities are. Better control of what to take on and what to decline.

    This year has been a good year, that I survived.  Last year, I was too hung up with the Western States race and I said this year, I will take a step back and do things I enjoyed the most. I did tame down a bit with my running.  2024 was an unbelievable year in term of achievements and time commitment I gave.  2025, I did not train as much or as hard.

    I did still do a lot of running.  Most of my weekends were around either running my races or involved with Caroline’s races. We said we will do less of them next year.

    Stats:  I did 29 events out of 52 weeks.  A little more than every other week! Many of them required long driving for flying to another state.

    I ran 6 100 milers (2 dnf).  2 Marathons. 4 x 50 mile (2 dnf), 1 x 100k (GSER). 2 x 40 mile, 1 x 70 mile (the Ring).

    I reached 4895 measured miles (life time). Of course many of my training miles were not logged, maybe 4-5 times this amount.  The earth circumference is 24,901 miles.  I’m not there yet, but it is almost 1/5th of that.  The reason I mentioned the earth is with a team of 10, last year we finished running around the world.  It is a distance dream that maybe one day I could do it for real.  I might have already did enough miles to equal to the distance of going around the earth once (if included my training runs over the last nine years).

    Here are some race highlights of 2025.

    My good races:  Grindstone 100, finally finished this after 3-4 tries.  I lost count how many years since I got hook into this race.  Last year was the most brutal DNF.  This year was its redemption. No, I won’t go back there next year other try other than more camping at the Twot.

    Vermont 100 – squeaked by this one.  Hope to do it one more time.  Third the charm they say!  As well as Virginia 100, I squeaked by it, but it was very satisfying.  It will be my motto next year.  The only reason I finished was the song: “He went leaping and praising God.”  I was the lame man whom God made whole again!  The race felt like a meraculous healing. Then, the latest race was the Devil Dog 100.  I just grinded it out.  I was thankful I got it done.  Hope to run it again in the foreseeable future, at least for 2026.

    Massanutten 100 –  I was a pacer to a very good friend at the MMT100 for 2025, the only year I sat out because I was too exhausted.  God is gracious I was able to help a runner that totally aligned with me own goals.  As a pacer, we tried to get our runner to the finish, but ultimately, it was the runner who puts in the work.  It was thrilling we got it done.  I signed up for next year to run it myself. It will be me, myself to be in the driver seat again.  It is a thrilling race to write about.

    Old Dominion and Eastern States 100.  Both, I did not finish.  Old Dominion was harder than I anticipated.  Same for Eastern States.  Eastern States was at the level I thought where it should be.  I needed to work hard at it if I want a finish.  I think Eastern States is easier than Grindstone though and even easier than Massanutten.  Some of my friends disagreed.  Just my opinion.  I felt Eastern States is “rubnable.” But I am strong on hill climbs, so it makes it easier.

    Thank you Caroline for being at my every race this year.  Whether they were successful or a failure, it was a good run.

    Trips:  I was proud of being able to camp out on July 4th weekend on the Grindstone course.  It was my one and only backpacking trip of the year.

    Holaday Lake.  50k++ Nothing to write about the race itself but my time surrounding the race was memorable.  Most of my trips are also races.  We went to Farmville and ran on the High Bridge.  It was my first time to visit Farmville.  I passed through several time but this time, I actually knew where I was.

    GSER – 100k in Atlanta.  I went there almost every year since 2020.  Last year and this year were most memorable.  I got to show the city to Caroline.  Of course she’s been there before.  What so special is we ran 62 miles through the city from Kennasaw Mountain to Stone Mountain.  We rode the train around Stone Mountain and looked at the carving on the rock face. Not sure if I will be back next year, I hope to be.  There will be scheduling conflict with the C&O 100.  Not that I plan to run the C&O, but I likely will be there to help out.  I love my local races anf the Harper Ferry area too.

    Utah – DC Peaks.  I learned a lesson about winter running.  Got to met friend and pacer.  I went out twice this year, one for Wasatch to crew a friend and one for my own race.  Happy Caroline helped me there. The race itself was too short (because I dropped out early).  What we did other than racing left behind better memories.

    Savannah.  (no report) It was a busy trip.  My goodness.  I think the journey what captured my imagination.  We came back when it was snowing and our plane/trip took us to Baltimore instead of DC.  We took the train back to Virginia.

    End of the year, it made me to think about what I accomplished what I set out to do for next year.  I think my one goal this year was to finish Grindstone (and Eastern States, alas).  All other goals were pretty much incidental.  I am happy the year did not broke me too badly. 

    Relationship wise, it has been a roller coaster ride.  I don’t even know what to say.  There are successes and failures.  Not sure if that is appropriate to call them successes/failures like races.  They were Events, high points and lows.  We finished a course of counseling. There were many crying and times of joy.  More laughters than crying.   We trudge on.  Relationship is not like races.  There is no redo.  There are a lot changes in the future expected.  One step at a time.  To me life is like a 100 mile race, there will be slow portion and fast, we go from one aid station to the next.

    What’s next.  That will be part 2.  Somehow, I need to align my current goals with those coming up. I mean for the next few years too. I will be evolving.

    Personally, I already signed up for races: MMT 100, Eastern States, Devil Dog, Vermont, Hennepin (new race for me, In Oct.), and Kettle Morraine (new for me, in June).  It is quite a load.  The one I will be stressing the most will be Massanutten and Eastern States.  I will be perpetually training again.  Also, Thinking of Angela Ivory 100, should I or should not I?  Likely not, but would like to, and that for another day.

  • [693] catch-up, Philly Marathon (cheering crowd), NCR Marathon (half)

    So it has been some time since my last race. Holiday and such we are into December at the very end of the year.

    So many things happened in personal life, with all the ups and downs, and racing, it is hard to say or remember what happened in between.

    Of course, if I run I would remember. Last few events, I have sat out, maybe due to lack of money, motivation, and also to let my body recover from some hard runs I did such as Grindstone and the Virginia 100. Sometimes, it is not the body needed rest but the mind.

    It was a season for me to do nothing. One stand out was going to Mountain Masochist 50 Run to volunteer. It was a course I hiked on in my earlier days 2016/2017. Never had I thought that trail was runnable. So it will be my future project to go back to run on it. That reminded me, I forgot to ask the Aid Station captain to sign my volunteering form for Vermont 100 for 2026. Oopsie.

    The second event I did was going to Philadelphia to cheer Caroline for her marathon. I ran it two years ago now seemed ancient. I had a good time when I ran and I believe the condition was same this time. We had nice weather.

    We executed the plan like my previous trip to Philly. We arrived a day before. My cousin happened to be there at the Convention Center for a gaming event and so I asked him to pick up the race Bib for Caroline, otherwise we would have been hard press to try to get there before the closing. We arrived two hours after closing (5 pm). It would have been tight if we had tried to pick up the bib ourselves.

    With the assurance that the Bib was secured. We stopped for lunch in Virginia (Yechong, my favorite Korean place) and later met up my cousin in chinatown at a pizza place where I tried the authentic philly cheesesteak. It was too rush to truly enjoy my first cheesesteak in Philly, so one day, I got to go back and try again.

    We stayed in New Jersey since hotels in Philly were either fully booked or many times the price we were willing to spend.

    It meant the very next day, we had to get up 3 or 4 in the morning and we made the drive to Philly. I was worried that there would not be a place to park our car but there were plenty public parking garages near the community school. Sorry, I forgot which street that was on. Parking was around $12 for the whole day, which was good. We paid like $15 the night before for an hour in chinatown.

    We stayed in the car until reasonable time to walk to the start. I was anxious to get my runner into the chute and into runner village. As I remembered, the walk might be a mile out and for me in the previous year, going to security took a long time. Caroline though breezed through the security check. The runner village where runners waited for the start was restricted to runners only, so I waited outside.

    She did not use a drop bag and she wore a light jacket, so she was cold before the race even started. I had on plenty of clothes and winter coat and whole shebang so I was toasty. I saw many runners tossed away their throw-away jacket. She could have done the same like at the MCM earlier.

    We waited and finally by 7 am, the first wave came out. Caroline lined up in the 5th wave. There were two sides of the street where runners would be running through. I stood on the midian and betting she would come through from the left. However, it happened just too fast and I did not see her went by. She could have gone by from the right.

    When I was sure, no runners were left, I walked to mile 6, which was just a few blocks from the start for us, but runners had ran 6 miles by then. There, I set up to catch her. This time was a success. The street was narrower only like 5 runners deep, so it was easy to spot. Also, by now runners are pretty much slowing down. We could even read out runner’s names on their bibs and cheered by calling their names. I stayed maybe an hour and then had another breakfast at some food truck nearby.

    So, I checked the map and followed the crowd to the next location by the river. This was maybe 3 miles away. It was so exciting with everyone screaming. For runners, it was their mile 12. They went up to the reservoir and then running back down, so we could see them twice. So I heckled Caroline again. She was moving well. Pace-wise, on pace for me to arrive exactly when she appeared. So I was please for not having missed her.

    After the river section, it was my lunch time. I stopped by some grocery store and brought a bag of chips. Caroline had a long way to go to a turn around point at mile 20. I had plenty of time.

    If I had a car or bike or know how to take the public transport, I could have gone to mile 20 to see her. I spent maybe two hours trying to get there but in the end I realized I wouldn’t make it so I started cutting across town to where I think she would be. It was just passed the cementery. Someone told me it was mile 23. Caroline arrived like a few minutes later. So it was perfect.

    The final stop would be the finish line. I walked and run using a shortcut to mile 26, learning from earlier wandering around the race course. I think it was using 19th st or something. Caroline came in strong and happy. I was happy but she was tired for sure.

    We ended our day at a dimsum restaurant nearby and then it was a long drive home.

    #####

    I ran the MCM turkey trot. Nothing say about that other than I love 10K.

    At the NCR Marathon, I was not going to run originally, but Caroline signed up so why not do some light running too. I decided to do the Half marathon instead of the full. Caroline then dropped down from the full to run with me. We would receive the same swags anyway – a sweater and a blanket.

    I was not as anxious doing a half than if it were a full marathon, knowing I could finish by the cutoff (5 hours). The day was cold but sunny. It has been a long time since running a half so I did not know how to pace. I told myself to go out slow. I used my recent 10k race as a guide, running around a 10 min pace. At the turn around, I pushed a bit harder. In my mind, Caroline was a few minutes ahead and was out of sight. But at the turn around, I saw her again. She just did a marathon a week ago so there was no way she could keep up my pace. Then the full marathon runners came back and caught up with four miles left to go. There I met the second place runner and he seemed struggling. So he said he will follow me, I said no, I am too slow for him. Indeed, he followed me and we finished together. He was dropped down to 5-6th place.

    It was his first marathon. He said never again will run a marathon. Oh, brother, I told him to try again. To me, I will never get podium or anywhere near. I was just glad I could finish. I hope he will find joy in running.

    We went back to the school and had a lot of soup and later had a good meal at Yechong, a Korean restaurant.

    Happy Turkey Holiday and xmas if I am not able to post before then. I wish everyone a safe holiday.

  • [679] Life, misc, catching up (Catoctin 50k)

    I wanted this year Catoctin run to be like last year except I could not step into the same river twice.  I had a series of races right before it.

    Recent setbacksOld Dominion 100  did not go the way I wanted to go.  It was so close yet so far. 10 miles too far.  I don’t know if I can get over that. I can blame it on the training etc of what leading up to it.  In the end, it resulted in an injury.  So I was sidelined for following two weeks (on my third week without running). I am now 99% recovered but still haven’t got back out running like I used to.

    Then came the OSS/CIA 50.  I knew I would not be able to do well when I entered.  It was hard.  I love the hard run.  I was limited by what my injured leg could bear.  Luckily I did not make it worse. 

    When the Catoctin race came, I was smart enough to sit out on it.  It pained me that I could not run in it.  I chose the second best option to volunteer.  I was asked what if one day I could not run any more, what would I do. I got a good taste of that.  I was injured once, a few years back due to a lower back pain and had to sit out for a few weeks, so this was not the first time I had to take time off from running.  If one day I never run again, which is inevitable because I will get old, I will deal with it when the time comes. I would still love to cheer on others.

    This year has been great. I don’t know why.  I haven’t done anything significant but just feel great. Maybe having less stress of not racing so much.

    I wanted so much to make it like last year, mostly because of the race Western States 100.  It has been exactly a year when I toed the start line.  This weekend is the Western States 100.  I wished I were there.  Couple of the people I know are running in it.  I will be very happy for them regardless how they will do.  Some will be chasing for the grand slam, so some I will be seeing (again) in Vermont or at Wasatch.  I am not doing the slam myself, but I hope to be there. The perspective is a bit different now playing a supportive role compares to doing it myself. 

    Likewise, I originally wished to write about my experience at the Cat 50k this year.  But as a supporter, it is not the same as running in it (2024-report).  I was happy I volunteered last weekend and saw my friends going through the aid stations on a tough course and saw them survived the race and also some that did not. We earned praises from runners and the race director for managing our station well. 

    One thing I wanted to mention was the course was slightly changed before the race (there was a reroute) and because this was an old school kind of race, in that we don’t mark the course, so it was a fun day for people getting lost (for some people not all).  We did our part, in that unofficially, we kind of marked our small section of coming into the aid station with balloons.  And because of about a quarter mile section that deviated off the trail, we sent volunteers near the exit to tell runners where to go.  I was mostly the person there unless my friends came through then I either helped them or joked around and sent them out the wrong way (joking).  I felt I did an important job that day. (I was at the Delauter aid station — we were a newbie crew but we were praised for running the aid station like pros, which I was glad).

    So as expected, the last three weeks haven’t been too well for me.  I took 3 DNF/DNS’s.  Never before had I encountered such setbacks.  They were inevitable.  I have done only two smallish runs so far, about couple miles instead of the usual 25-30 miles. 

    I was asked when is my next big one.  It is coming up in couple weeks.  I don’t feel ready for it. I know I am not. The race name (in VT) must not be mentioned for fear of jinx-ing it.  Then another big one after that (Eastern States) and then Grindstone 100.  I have an axe to grind for that one. I am not afraid of you, Mr. Grindstone (for those who grew up watching Home Alone).  They all come one after another.  Ahhh.  One harder than before.  I have to start training hard.

    That’s a wrap for this week.  I will be watching the Western States even though I am not running in it and probably never will again (report). I love my buckle!  I still need to get a belt for it. 

    When I could not run any more, all I have left is memories from my former races.  Yes, and that actually what I did while volunteering, we were talking about our races when I was asked which one was my favorite.  I love all my races, thinking back those times I was out on the trail.  There’s another alternative, that is hiking/backpacking, more to come (exciting news to share in the next post).

    A small 5 mile training run with a friend at the Manassas National Battlefield last weekend (Juneteeth).

  • [676] Catch up

    My head is still stuck in Atlanta of a trip I took there at the beginning of May and now we are in June.  If readers were wondering why so few posts lately, that was why.

    I have a bit of catching up to do.  Maybe it is a little understatement nothing much happened in that time. Well, nothing big happened.  I lived my life.  Things happened.

    A week was spent for an one night camping trip at Lake Fairfax. It was my best trip in a lomg time.  I haven’t done a camping trip since maybe 2020.  This was not per se a real trip, because it was literally by my house, about 30 minutes away.  However, I had such a good time with the people there.  Then best of all, I was able to do some trail running and a super long urban run on the following day, something I also haven’t done for a long time, possibly since Covid time.

     I cowboy-camped, meaning sleeping without a tent, right under the stars.  It was a good night. The temperature was about right on the cooler side, maybe in the 50s, so it was a comfortable sleep. 

    I ran about 30 ish miles, might have been 35 miles, mostly on a flat rail to trail path nearby, the W & OD trail.  It has been a long time since I have been on this trail and many sights have changed such a whole lot more data centers.   The highlight of the run was eating at the Carolina Brothers Pit BBQ about near the turn around point in Ashburn. We actually ran past it for maybe 3-5 more miles before turning around.  Then I ran all the way back to the car just before subset. It was a day that worn me out, which is rare. Possibly, I was no longer in top shape.

    The following weekend, I volunteered at our local running club 100 miler, the famous Massanutten Mountain Trail 100, which I ran in the last three years but this year I decided to sit out and volunteer at an aid station and to cheer runners on. 

    I had a chance to mark the course the day before in one of my favorite sections of the course, the Kerns Mountain, a notorious nasty and rocky section of the race. 

    When the race was happening, I was one of a few to pre run sections of it (as a course checker, in case more markers/ribbons should be placed) and mine was from mile 50-62. While doing so, I also took part in clearing a blow down. 

    A volunteer and I was using a hand saw to cut a fallen tree that was blocking the trail.  It took us an hour or so and we ended up giving up since it was too heavy to move it to a side.  We did improve the passage by lowering the branch closer to the ground so runners could just hop across instead of climbing over it.

    Little did we know once we left the trail that afternoon, the wind blew down a bigger tree just outside the trailhead, blocking the exit for cars onto the road and some volunteer cars therefore, were trapped in in a nearby lot.  There was no one with a powered chain saw clear the logjam.  So it was an evening adventure for a bunch of volunteers sent in to clear it.  Yes, eventually, someone was able to borrow a saw and cleared the blow downs.  A side note, the following day after the race, more trees were blown down there and a runner (a friend of mine), had their car trapped in the parking lot a second time.  We had some strong winds that night for volunteers and runners.  And a storm blew through before the race and course was as wet as it can be.

    The best was yet to come, a friend called me up not on the race day but a week before and asked if I could pace him.  I promised sure, since I was not running in it, pacing would be the next best thing. 

    So throughout the day while volunteering at various jobs, I kept track on my runner.  It seemed my runner might not going to make the cut offs.  Each one was very close like by a minute or two.  I was betting, likely this dude wouldn’t make it past to where I was supposed to pace him and I would have a night of sleep.  I was supposed to meet him at mile 65, like at 3-4 am in the morning.  I feared, I might overslept and be a no-show. 

    So by evening, with no updates yet if my runner had dropped, I figured I better get ready and went to an earlier aid station at mile 50 to meet up instead of at mile 65.

    My runner made it in in the nick of time.  From 10:30 pm onward, we would continue battling one cut off after another to the next day’s afternoon 5:00 pm, which was the end of the race. 

    There were high points when morning arrived and the low points like noon the second day when the uncertainty whether we would finish.  As a cinderella story, we did make it in, they recorded the time as 35:59:54.  A hairbreath, 36 hours being the time limit.  Everyone cheered. I was glad. It was crazy. Words could not describe what went through our heads. This was for a 74 year old for his 10th finish at this race.

    Why this affected me so much was three years ago when I was falling behind on my pace at this race, I was chasing cutoffs.  But unlike him, I did not make it to the finish line but stopped at mile 95.  My friend did what I could not do by keeping at it one step after another, even when things seemed bleak, he finished. 

    Many people think I might have something to do with helping him, maybe my presence or encouragement got him through.  I do take the credit of being there, but all the work and struggles were him alone.  As the clock was ticking down, I was thinking to myself, if that were me, I wouldn’t make it.  Yet on the flipside even if I were not there, he would still have made history.  I was happy I got to experience it on the front row seat with him, battling with him of beating the cutoffs. What an excitement.  My blog entry just doesn’t do justice.

    The last weekend in May (Memorial Day weekend), I ran a 50k at Cowans Gap.  More will be written later if I get to it.  It was a fine weekend and a very good run.  10 hours were a little too long for me. I wish I could have done it in 9 or less. It is what it is.

    Then this week, I went to Roanoke and did a trail marathon.  It was also a fine weekend. I wish I have time to write about it. I ran it in 6:03, (with the time cutoff being 6:30) probably my best effort before my 100 mile.

    Briefly, I had one of the best hike while there. And here is a picture.

    Out on McAfee Knob, the most photographed place on the whole Appalachian Trail (might be a bit of an exaggeration).  I had to do the signsture AT pose.

  • [664] Holiday Lake 50k+++

    Holiday Lake.  I did this race couple years ago, in Feb 2023 (report), as part of a long President Day’s weekend fun.

    This year it was a Holiday Lake three-plus- plus-plus, because the trail/course was extra long.  I think it ended up like 33-34 miles for a 50k. And also, I did 3 events like last time. Triple crown.

    A friend recommended me to run this race back in 2019, when I was still new to trail running. 

    I was out training on my favorite course at the Signal Knob one afternoon.  It was the only course at the time where I knew I could get some decend hill runs.

    I ran into a trail runner G (an amazing dude).  I did not know who he was at the time. 

    As usual I started talking to people during the run. I asked what trail races he would recommend.  He rolled off his tongue, Highland Sky, Promise Land and Holiday Lake. So far I only have done Holiday Lake because it have been very hard in getting in them (I don’t sign up in time).

    He said, tell them his name and the RD would know him. 

    At the time I was scare of running in the winter.  Holiday Lake takes place in February.  So the race was not one I was going to run.

    Then of course in 2023, I forgot about it and signed up.  What exactly prompted me to sign up and run was lost in history.  I thought that was a once and done thing.  I admired people who done it year after year.

    There are too many things going on in February for me.  I have the MMT training and the BBR training every year for the last three years. It was almost every weekend full.  And there is the C&O training, or the O Dominion training.  I just did not want to add on a Holiday Lake too.  And TWOT too, but that is for the future.  All those events fighting for one precious weekend.

    Originally, I chose the MMT training run over the Holiday Lake because MMT course is free to run. A lot of my mighty trail friends too prepare for their MMT race would run in it.  I would not want to miss it because I love to be with them. This year though, I will be volunteering at the MMT 100 race, so missing the MMT training would not be too big a deal.

    But Holiday Lake seems to be important for my other friend.  I don’t have to be there but it would be nice if I go.  There’s a chance to camp too the night before the race and night after the race and as well as the third night.  It is a long holiday so in theory we could run on Monday as well to make it into a big weekend fun.

    This year, I took a half day off so I could get to the pre race briefing early.  As usual, Dr. H would be giving a talk on trail running. I did not know him in the past but he is a local legend.  He set the first FTK on some of very long trails around the nation in his younger days.  I wanted the free pizza dinner too offered before the talk. I kicked myself for missing the talk and pizza last time I race at the Holiday Lake.

    As it turned out, due to traffic and various reasons (I did not plan for stopping for dinner or gas), we missed the opening ceremony.  We should have left in the morning to avoid the afternoon rush hour traffic.

    Instead of camping out, we stayed at a hotel for all three nights. Uff-dah! The weather was cold, so it was a good call.  I could have still camped out if were alone, but did not want others to suffer with me.  It was raining heavily as well on Saturday, so a hotel would allow us to dry our stuff. 

    The race itself was good. It was a hard run but was not too hard (I barely finished, with a time of 07:45).

    It was good I  went for a prerace training run a couple weeks ago, so the course was still fresh in my mind. I did not get lost except for a small section, maybe losing 5 minutes.

    It was cold as usual for February here, being in the winter. By noon, rain came down. First was drizzling then it was a steady ‘light’ rain.  It didn’t seem light to me.  I was drenched head to toes. We were glad the race was not canceled, that being snow was originally in the forecast.  Some might have preferred snow but here, if it snows, it would also become icy.

    The first loop, I came in at 03:30, which was a bit slower than last time (I think I had 3:10-3:15 previously). The course was maybe a mile longer since a bridge was washed out.  So the slower time was expected and understandable.

    The second loop really hit me hard.  I knew I was totally out of shape and ran too hard in the beginning. I was breathing hard.  I was trudging through the muddy trail.  Rain came.  Some runners caught up to me. 

    Wilbur, the guy who ran it 23 times was running with me. His friend Marshall caught up.  Marshall and I ran the Old Dominion last year and shared 35 miles of trail.  I think it was closer to 50 miles. Anyway, we chatted and I listened to him chatted away with Wilbur and Alyson.

    They finished maybe 5 minutes ahead of me.  At one point on the power line trail (Tailor trail), someone put ribbons leading to an unknown trail. I think it is likely course vandalism to purposefully confused runners.

    Marshall called out to me as I was going the wrong way but I saw other runners going down the wrong trail and I followed them. Few minutes later, they turned back around.  I did too.  Marshall and Wilbur were on the correct path.  I lost a precious time here.

    My legs were tired.  Trails were muddy, slick and wet.  I managed to finish.  My friend brought me two hamburger and I gladly ate them and I changed into dry clothes at the same time.  I was shivering for a long time.

    It was the end of the day. I was glad to be back at the hotel for a good night sleep.  We ate the left-overs from the day before, but I was still hungry, so we went across to a gas station, Sheetz or Wawa for ramen but we could only find the instant mac-and-cheese.  I had spicy Buffalo Mac & Cheese. Not recommended. So I ate my friend’s portion too.

    ****

    Farmville.  The next day was also raining.  We planned to run 10 miles on the High Bridge Trail nearby (in Farmville, VA).

    High Bridge, mile 0.0. I ran (walked) with an umbrella

    I love this bridge.  I did another 50k race here back in who knows when (report).  The High Bridge 50k race is no long being held.

    Why it is called High Bridge? I think it was Virginia highest bridge back when people still used railroad.  Now it is just a rail-to-trail path. We think it is about 50k in length.

    We ran 5 miles out and 5 miles back to Farmville.  Some notable events were a tree fell on the path while we were running back to town. It was very windy. There was a high wind advisory. We also saw a group of Longwood’s college students running in the rain too.  We initially thought we were the only ones out there.

    ****

    MMT. The weekend could not be complete without a time on the MMT (Massanutten Mountain Trail).  Initially, we planned to go to Dragon Tooth on the Appalachian Trail near Roanoke, but the drive there and back would take significant time.  I didn’t think we have the time.

    I’d rather want to do the MMT3 training loop, but in the end we settled for MMT 1 training run.  We did a out-and back from Woodstock to Edinburg Gap. This would allow us to be back at home before nighfall.

    It was still a cold day but I enjoyed being on my favorite course any time of the year.

    Sunday, we made our way to Woodstock.  At the time, we had not finalized our plan yet.  We passed Harrisonburg, then New Market and Edinburg.  We then continued to Woodstock. There we had coffee while waiting to check in to our room.  It was too cold to camp out that night.  Earlier, we had the best meal of the weekend at Cracker Barrel. So we did not need to eat that night. I was still drained from the run the day before. 

    In theory, there was still plenty of day light left to do some hiking around but wind really picked up in the afternoon and it was too cold to be outside. Hotel it was.

    Woodstock Tower.  The following day, we had a choice to run up on Woodstock on foot or drive up.  To prepare for my race for Old Dominion, running up on the road is preferred. However, I really did not want to wake up that early to try.

    We ended driving up.  I kind of expect the gate to be closed. Indeed it was.  So we drove back down and went the other way by going around to Strasburg and passed the Signal Knob on Fort Valley Road.  I drove based on memory of having crewed someone back in 2023 for the Old Dominion race. Luckily, I found the Woodstock Tower Road from the other side and we drove on up.  It took us a good chunk of the morning, so we started around 8:30 (late).  The temperature was still very cold. It was good the sun was up and was sunny.

    We did 14 miles that day.  7 miles out and 7 miles back.  The ground was frozen, but overall it was a very nice day.

    Normally during training run, we rarely wanted to leave the trail to check out the Tower.  Today was the day we had time.  Actually, it was too cold and I just wanted to go home, but my friend wanted to climb up.  Some ruffians who came before us back in January drew some PG-13 images on the floor. 

    Woodstock Tower, East and West.  Bottom is the hand glider launch point. 
    [unsensored] We assumed it is a still life painting of pears, banana and apples or oranges.

      Night. We ended the final day for a nice bowl of tofu soup amd some ginger tea to close the day.  I preferred rice tea.

  • Day662 Midlife crisis

    [updating a post written in 2023, might not have published back]

    oh no…January 2, I don’t have a new year resolution this year. I will resolve to be purposeful!

    This probably will be a weird post. I haven’t figured out what I want to do for this year.

    Last time I was in this state was back in 2016. I ended up buying a truck, fell in love with a woman, and somehow running a marathon (actual a 5k, but it led to signing up for a marathon). Then ended up going up a mountain like Moses, experienced a life changing event at a burning bush. No not like Moses, I did not lead his people out of Egypt afterward. I’m kind of seeing myself doing it again now.

    I still drive a truck! Loving it. People I knew started calling me Bear for my outdoors adventure image though I am nowhere near the macho-ness.

    Here am I now, what should I do?? I did all those things because they were new and hard and adventureous. They are no longer new to me now. I still love to spend time on the mountains.

    I am not into creating a new branding of myself. Usually though soul seeking time would result in remaking myself like back in 2016. Maybe I am pivoting to something new.

    I think it comes down to what is worthwhile to do. This time I think would be less dramatic. Actually, I kind of remake myself the past year.

    I need to realign my mission goal again. (I did during 2023, but it was not published).

    I still want to run across the continent. I do want to travel more. I do want to race more.

    The last few years were fun. I got myself to be an ultra marathon runner. And claimed the title of runner of the year in my running club.  It was fun. It took me longer to get where I am. I am still not very good at it but I can say, distances no longer scare me. Anything under 100 is doable. Anything over 100 is probably doable with some planning. The mystery is no longer there.  I am itching to try a 200 miler.

    It opens door to many races. What I really want to try is the Atacama Desert Crossing. I want to try some multi-day running adventures.

    Couple friends wanted to do Vol State or HOTS. Someone suggested the trilogy. I want to do the Tuscarora trail or something similar like the Mid state trail. Here I am dreaming.

    *Rim to Rim of the Grand Canyon. While driving up to Pennsylvania, my friend mentioned something she wanted to do is to hike from Rim to Rim of the Grand Canyon. I did something similar (I only hiked down to the River and back up) and at the time I was not an ultra runner yet. I don’t know if I can fit that into this year. It would be dope if I can do it. Saying this, because I would go just for a hike, even though truly I wanted to run across the Canyon and back in one day.

    Another thing I want to do this year is the Sierra Club One Day Hike (100K). I was interested in this before I was an ultra runner. At the time Hiking one day from DC to Harper Ferry seems interesting because it was impossible for me at the time. Of course if I get accepted, I would run this thing instead of hiking. Probably will take me 16 ish hours.

    I need to make more friends who is into what I am into. Meeting Caroline was something like that. We are both seeking to cross off 50 states marathon. She is like 10 states ahead in 2023. And she did it, finished all fifty states.

    Funny nothing much has changed since 2023.  My goals still are same today as two years ago. A lot of changes are in the air though, vaguely, my career, having a new roommate, moving to a new place, starting a new relationship, and future. Only till 2026 will we know.  My life might turn upside down.  I might have to put aside my personal goals for something bigger. Well I don’t have to have everything together. Once😀😛 I have a clearer picture, I will post again like I did in 2023, likely though it will be 2026 or 2027.  As I get older, pace slow down. I can’t accomplish as much as before, so 2023 goals are still 2025-2026 goals.

    A couple more resolutions

    *Be laser focused

    *overcoming my fear of starting new things

    My previous goals

    1. 2023 published version

    2. 2024 goals

    Last year, I was aiming for finishing the race called Western States.  It was everything to me.  This year, I get to cheer other people doing it. I really want to do it again or to be there.

  • [661] Happy Lunar New Year

    Really nothing to post.  Not much runing is going on in my life.  I love to write race reports but on everything else is plain boring.  I am just going through the motion in life, doing the same thing every day. Putting this post out to say I’m okay. This is actually an old post from October that I did not publish, but still applicable.

    My legs are still kind of hurt.  I could not run at my full capacity.  But also mostly is a mental. If I want to run, my legs would heal faster.  Really? Usually. I guess it is good to let it slowly heal. It has been two weeks since my last race.

    News.  I got through the waitlist for Rim to River 100 but decided not to run it. As much as I was glad the wait is over, but also I knew the race was not for me.

    There’s not much a desire to do the race at this time. There’s always next year.

    The Grindstone’s post race funk is strong.  A General lack of motivation and will to run. I tried to tell myself I can’t rest on my accomplishments. I don’t. I never run for the praises of my peers but because I felt like it. Grand slam was just a title. I did it because I like the races and the challenge. I will consider another grand slam run if the opportunity presents itself. 

    Something that lifted me up.  A friend did a 50 miler this weekend on a similar course as the Wasatch Front, from East Mountain to Bountiful. It seems so long ago when I was there. I would definitely want to do it next year.  It is in Utah but I felt the race worth the trip.  Where can you spent 15-16 hours doing a 50 miler?  I think that is a fast time for the course.  It probably would take me like 17-18 to go the same distance there. Relatively for my age and condition. (The race is DC Peaks for future signup, and I signed up, probably will be my first out of state 50 miler)

    A few more races popped up this weekend.  I have not had the money or motivation to do them. Definitely I would like to do it again like last year. 

    One of the races was the Blue Ridge Roanoke Double.  I ran the marathon twice in one day. It was last year but seems like ages ago!

    The fun thing is how to avoid scheduling conflict.  There are so many races I want to do but can’t do all of them. In my mind, I kind of know which ones I want to do, but it is so tempting in signing up for all of them. (I took care of the race scheduling until summer.)

    Enough said.  Most important factor is money.  I have to be careful since my bank account is like only a third of last year. Currently can only affort about 2-3 races for the whole year. My budget is probably even lower. I kept thinking back to my former office manager who told me don’t go starving to do the things you like. True. It has not come to that point yet.

    What I have been doing the last few weeks:

    -Played in the snow

    -Went to Charleston (for the first time)  (possible will make a trip again there myself next year, either running a marathon or an ultra)

    -Did a training run for Holiday Lake and is the reason my legs are trashed for a few days

  • [660] some boring stuff

    Disclaimer, I am not a professional financial adviser so don’t take this post or any my opinions on financial matters as anything you can rely on for your own financial planning.

    I am about to dive deep into some numbers on retirement planning because it is a topic dear to my heart (other than running) and recently I had a flash of insight that prompted me to write this. I have been thinking about it for several years.

    I started planning for my retirement when my manager told me about the company’s retirement matching about 15 years ago and I have been consistently putting money in.

    Initially, I did not know how much to put in but over time, started enjoy everything on the topic and developed my own opinion. (see my second post on the topic at the end of 2021, where I was trying to figure out over how much to contribute, now I have mature much).

    I faced with the same question everyone is facing.  How much should one contribute?  Of course, there’s kind of maximum (capped by law for 401k and one’s income) that almost no mortal can reach.

    I know if I “max” my contribution, I would be in good hand. But what about minimum?  Zero is an answer but we want a partical answer, a sweet spot.  This is a much harder question to answer.

    (1) How much do I need to save now annually? (also how much I need to save by now is a good question too). There are some online guides, of how many times one’s salary by certain age.

    (2) Related to this is how much I need to save by retirement (e.g. 10x one’s salary)

    In order to know that, the third question is (3) How much do I need annually at retirement? (future)

    (4) How do I plan to withdraw? (future)

    These questions are what can keep me up at night regarding retirement.  This post is about answering Q3 and Q4, specifically Q4.

    The answer of how big a nest egg needed is different for everyone, depending how early one start, how much to contribute, their tolerance of risk, and how far away is the retirement date (they call this the time horizon).

    I am going do some hand waving.  Experts estimate we (millenials) need between 1.5 million to 3 million dollars saved up for retirement.  That is a lot of money, especially at the upper range. 

    I agree that if I have that much I will be set.  Many don’t even know if they can save up for 1 million dollars. I think 1 mil is about the ball park for my case.

    There’s also social security for those in the US, which is a government entitlement program. What about it? The prevaling thought is it won’t be enough for retirement and likely won’t be available when my generation is about to retire. But we won’t talk about that for now. We will assume it will still be around.

    A few people have a pension.  We won’t talk about that either. Those have it, would be better off than the rest, because it means, they need to depend less on one’s own savings. However, usually pension like social security is also not enough either (or it can go bankrupt too, which we have seen, such as when Enron went under, it almost took many pensions with it).

    To find how much to save, I used the 4% rule.  Note, we are working backward here.  That you should only withdraw around 4% from your retirement account each year to ensure your savings will last through your retirement. 

     Whatever the dollar amount needed annually at retirement, say $60,000, subtract off what social security or pension plan will provide, say $15,000-20,000 for our optimistic case, $60000-$20000 -> $40,000 (to make the math easy). 

    Then we do some math magic here: 1 / 4% is 25x (inverse of 4% is 25), multiply 25 with the amount you think you need (for our example, it is $40,000 x 25 gives 1,000,000).  I know it’s a lot of math.  At retirement, you will need $1 million because 4% of $1 million will give $40,000.  We were working backward. 

    As long as you have 1,000,000 in the bank (or the retirement account), you can withdraw $40,000 each year.

    For most, this is the ideal case where each year they withdraw 4% from the account and it will grow back by the following year. It’s a money generating machine.

     As long as the growth rate is above 6.2%, money will not run out.  Why 6.2%? 2% for inflation, and 4.2% for recovering the $40,000 taken out. 

    This doesn’t account for what if one year there is less than a 6% growth, or even a negative growth (i.e., a recession). 

    There is always a risk of a recession, putting at risk that the capital would not be able to recover back to 1 million dollars. It is safe to assume every decade, there will be a recession.

    However, know that it would take a period of 25 years of 0% growth to draw down the balance of 1 million to zero (because 25 x 40000 is a million). 

    Someone ran a simulation thousand of times, and 4% rule is good enough to have the money last on majority of the time.

    What I concern about is the 4% rule being too conservative — that I will die with a lot of money left over (like a million dollars or even half a million).  I don’t mind having money left over, but if I could put less into retirement right now and use the money for other things while I am alive, why not.

     Note the following is not be a good idea for most people.  This is my insight. It goes that if you don’t want to die with a lot of money left over, the idea is to draw down enough so when you pass away, you have just right amount. The key assumption is you know exactly when you will die.

    Leaving the assumption aside, the math is pretty easy (at least easier than I have thought).  I have been thinking about this on and off and over the weekend I came across someone who wrote that retirement withdrawal can be considered as a mortgage payment.

      You can use the same loan amortization schedule to calculate the withdrawal amount needed to have the a zero balance left over. Eureka!

    Imagine you have a mortgage of $1,000,000.  The number of years to pay off is the number of years in retirement.  The interest rate is the growth rate (minus inflation to be conservative). The payment would be the retirement withdrawal amount.

    For our example, the retirement term is 30 years, interest rate is 4%, to find payment, I used a financial calculator (or Excel formula), pmt: 4%, 30+1, -1000000, 1 -> $56,855. This is the amount to withdraw per year until the nest egg becomes zero. (It’s a lot of math/financial terms, sorry, but that is the idea of how to determine the withdrawal amount).

    Without social security, $56,000 won’t be enough if one were aiming for $60,000 for retirement. But with income from social security too, it is more than enough (we assume social security can provide 20,000).

    Is this better than the 4% method? No, because it is riskier.  It withdraws more than 4%.  Actually starting at 5.8%, and it increases each year until the balance is reaches zero (withdrawing at 100% on the final year)!

    The cool thing is the balance gets to zero at a predetermined period, and in our example, at the end of 30 (or 29) years (note to self, the off by one error). 

    Why use this way to withdraw?  If one is comfortable with the risk, one can have a lower balance to save up. 

    The question then is how much to save up if I want to withdraw $40,000 per year using this method instead of $56,000. This is just the reverse of how big loan I can take out if I my repayment is $40,000 per year. Excel function: pv(4%, 30+1, -40,000, 0) ~ $703,000.  This means instead of trying to save up to a million, we can save to about $700,000, which is 30% less than 1 million.  This is the answer to question 2.

    As for finding the answers to Q1, one can use a financial calculator.  Search the internet on how to save a million dollars or $700,000, would be bring to a schedule of how much to save per year.

    One can use the pmt formula in Excel again (or any financial calculator), for our example, e.g., i=4, n=30, pv=0, fv=-703000, answer: $12,534 (about $1,000 a month). (Q1)

    Note how high the payment is. For some, this is 15-20% of their income.  This assumes a low interest rate (4%) of return.  Most investors though are aiming for a 7-10 % annual returns by investing from the stock market.  Also the time horizon (period of investment, which is how long before retiring) is longer than 30 years, say 40 years.  This would reduce the amount one need to contribute to retirement. Start early, and put in regularly is the key.

    Summarizing, I don’t recommend calculating withdrawal using the amortization schedule because it is more risky of running out of fund earlier than anticipated.  But it is a way to know, it is possible to have a smaller nest egg and still can have the same amount for withdrawal during retirement.

    My second insight that kept me up this week is a bit embarrassing to describe.  I have not found how other people calculate this. But it came to me like a eureka moment when a friend shared how her coworker passed away right before her retirement. I have wrestled with this for some years (mostly on the math part).

    We all know we won’t live forever and there’s a chance we die before we even retire.  And so what?  How does that factor into how much to save.

    The chance we going to die before retirement date, e.g., age 65, can be estimated with one of those life insurance charts. 

    The thinking is: if we sure 100% we will live beyond 65, then we need the full amount.

    If we know there’s a 50% chance we won’t live past 65, some say we still need the full amount.  I say, we need less.  Maybe we only need to cut back a bit on the savings.

    If we know definitely we are not going live pass 65, then no need to save for retirement. Or maybe still save a little bit, like 5-10%.

    Majority though it is not as extreme as 50% but maybe at 5-10% likelihood we won’t live past 65, I think we should save less than what the actual need is (I would peg 3-5% reduction), because the chance we are going to die before 65 is not zero.  If we live pass the age, we beat the odds, and we should be glad to live with what we have (less), say 5% less in the balance is probably an acceptable tradeoff.

    Also the odds of dying increase each year. So in a sense, we could/should contribute less and less instead of more and more as we head into retirement (note, our tax system seems to encourage people to do the reverse, i.e., to save more to do a “catch-up contribution” as we near the retirement date).  There is also special points in life we our bodies age significantly (such as 50, 60, 70).  I think those are times we should evaluate how much (less) to contribute into the retirement account.

    This is controversal. I am not advocating everyone to avoid doing catch up contributions. However, there might be logical sense to not do so. 

    As for the amount to reduce, I used the expect value (no math is shown here because I don’t want people to follow this idea).  Just putting out here of the broad idea that one should not be in dismay of not having 1.5-3 million saved up, because there are various reasons, we can contribute less and not feel being not adaquate prepared.

    For some, a 5-6% reduction is not worth the risk (plus too much math to arrive here).

    Again, I posted this because of how far my thinking has changed since a few years ago. I will post again maybe in a few years from now on the topic.

  • [651][24.2#17] I goofed – Fall Review

    Day650 should have been a reserved for a review as I have done in the past, that every 50 posts is a “quarterly” review. I wrote less than before, so now every fifty posts is more an annual review. My last year review here Day 600 and also here last midterm, Day634.

    I accidentally published Day650 on  Stone Mill 50. I have not decided if I should resequence the post numbering after the fact.  I might just keep this as Day651. It doesn’t matter.

    I like to do reviews on myself to remind me I am aiming to accomplish something meaningful in life.  It is easy to say just do it. Yet, life is chaotic. And we are forgetful.  I can think of how many new year resolutions I have “accidentally” forgot.

    I love space and NASA at how each of their launch has a mission number.  I would like that very much for my life. Planning is a way of managing the unexpected so I could “boldly go where no man has gone before.”  Yes, I like my mission statement to be something that bold. I grew up watching Star Trek.

    I know what I want to write, but harder thing is how to write them. 

    The last 50 days (weeks actually), I wanted to train for running in the Western States 100. 

    I was not sure at the time if I would attempt to do the Grand Slam, which was 4 toughest/oldest ultra 100 mile marathon in the US. The  Western States was one of them.  Doing even one of them for me was like shooting the moon, but to do all four was beyond measure.

      Western States went well (report on WS100). My group of friends and supporters got me over the finish line in the nick of time.   I thought of quitting so many times, but lo and behold, I did it.  There indeed a lot going on than I can retell. I was beyond grateful. 

    Similarily, I finished the Grand Slam.

    I got Old Dominion 100 (report on OD100) already at the time. I still needed to do Vermont (report of VT100) in July and then Wasatch Front 100 (report of WF100) in September.  They were each amazing in their own adventure.  I still could not believe that it is true, that I got the slam.  It went more perfect than I would have hope.

    It has not been all ups.  After Wasatch I had the Grindstone 100. It was a race I thought I was ready for, but out from the left field, my body failed me.  I got to mile 99 but the time to finish already expired and I did not finish. There is always next year, which I signed up already.  (The full report of GS100 is here). It was a learning experience.  There were reasons that I could not get to the end. It was a good reflection for me to do better next time.

    I have been at a bit of a lost since my last big race.  Initially, I wanted to do two more 100 mile races to close the year with a perfect 10.  So, even though I got a spot in another highly coveted race at Rim to River 100, I turned it down. In the interim, a friend passed away. It helped me to do some soul reflection.

    At times, I gained clarity of what I wanted to do and why I would doing them.  But those moments were fleeting and hard to remember what I learned from them. 

    I had a some sort of race schedule hammered out.  I am pleased I will be committing to do some races next year. As for why I am doing them is still a bit vague. 

    Some asked how will I top what I did for this year.  Sure, I want to top it.  Every year should be better than the year before.  But doing it by the normal way is tough.

    Two years ago, I had run between two to three 100 milers in a giving year (Rocky Raccoon 2021, Rim to River 2021, Massanutten 2022 and Devil Dog 2022).

    Last year, I have done five (Blackbeard’s Revenge, Massanutten 2023, Burning River 2023, Grindstone 2023, and Devil Dog 2023). 

    This year the number increased exponentially. Besides the four races of the Grand Slam mentioned earlier, I ran C&O Canal 100, Massanutten 2024, Burning River 2024, and Grindstone 2024, totalling 9 big races for the year. Devil Dog 2024, my 9th race of the year, has been signed up, and the race will take place in several weeks.

    Doing quantitatively more than this year is not the way or that it is even possible. Also, I was thinking about quality over quantity, if I could do races on similar level or harder than this year.  Some asked if I will do the Bear or Big Horn or one of the Hard Rock qualifiers (such as Cruel Jewel). In the previous years, none of these races were even on my radar, because they are too hard.  I am still proccessing through if I have what it takes to finish them. The short answer is still no. There is no reason to top this year’s work.  I should be asking myself a different question. Truly, what do I want to do.

    It brings me back to focus on what is important for me.  I will close like last year report.  I like running marathons.  I should focus on finishing the 50 states.  I like running spontaneously.  I should do more of that.  I like to be on the mountain.  I should travel more.  This is very similar to what I wanted to do last year.  One of my deep goals is to travel to Nepal and do some crazy trekking.  I need to look at how to turn that into reality.  This is probably the easiest of all my big goals.  I would like to cross the AT, which is a very big goal in itself. Same as running across the continent.  I met some people who have done it.  There is also a Rim to Rim thing I like to do.

    Like last year, I won’t able to do all in one go or even accomplish one in the amount of time/resources/energy but putting it on the big board will get me to start thinking about them.

    Not race related, I visited Australia this year.  It was a goal long in the making, maybe the last 8-10 years.  As a bonus, I got to stop by Taiwan and ran a marathon there.  It was like a cherry on top. Of course, now Sydney Marathon is one of 7 marathon majors, I will have to go back to do it, some day. I found this trip to be better than all the big races I ran. Not to say, those races were insignificant, but there are other things worth doing and they come unexpectedly. Until next time, …

  • [649] observation/race signups

    When I have too much time on my hands, I start to think of existential questions.  Why am I running? Maybe that stems from my recent question what (races) am I running?

    I like the why part.  I think of it a lot, like every year at about this time. Because I don’t feel like running. I lost my mojo. Signup season is upon us, and it especially hard to find why I choose one race over another or why I run again. 

    The thing is, if I don’t want to do it. Then don’t. Bit if I signed up, then I must put in the work to get to the end.  There’s no half measure.

    I seem to have a harder time in picking a race this year.  Generally I want to run all the races.  But time and money constraints do exist. Last year, I have 10 times the budget. I could go wild. Not this year. I am already 1.5k deep in the hole after a day of signing up (1st world problem). Then how do I choose to pick one race over another is an interesting question to me.

    The answer is I don’t know.  I go by ‘feel’.  I hate it because, sometimes I feel very strongly about doing a race but another time I feel strongly not doing a race.

    It might be some ethical issue.  Some say a race organization is ‘bad’ such as they brought out smaller local races.  They say the corporal world is here to take away the mom-and-pop ones (name unsaid, because I am running some big corps races).  You won’t get the same experiences, some say. Indeed.  But I still begrudgingly take part in the Big Corporation races next year. Its inevitable.

    This post is not about corporate races over smaller races.

    Going to go into note taking form. I write because I am trying to find solution to a problem. I seem to lost sight of the big picture of why I run each year and I need some. It happens every year during the “slow” season.

    My identity is tied to the things I do.  The things I do also bring a lot of satisfaction. This year has been very busy.  I tried to achieve something I thought was not possible. It  was a shooting the moon thing (Western States race and the whole grand slam thing, plus many races I did).  In the end I did reach my goal. All fine and happy.

    However, I can’t do that in every race or every season. There are things that only happen once. I can’t repeat the same next year.

    By definition, trying very best is the very best. It hard to believe I will even exceed the very best the following year. Well maybe.  We only dream we can reach an even greater height.

    Yesterday, I look at my race plan. It seems scattered all over the place.  What the story I am trying to accomplish? In a sense trying to “run every race, every where, whenever” no limit.  That has been my motto since I started running.  It has been my guiding light in how I signed up races.  I was over joy last few years, I made several friends who share the similar take, of taking running to the extreme. We eat, sleep, dream and walk with running. There is never an end. Even the day we die, we will die running is our hope. On a side note, My first

    This year, one of my running friends past away. Our running club wrote/posted a very nice article of his impact to those who ran with him!

    As I think of next year races, I want to reach something of value. We could run tons of race, but sometimes they ended up being hollow.  There should be a race I would want to remember. Occasionally, there are races that are like that, I do it and forget. But then there would be one race that change everything.  This year, Western States was like that for me, a race that set me on the path for a grand slam. One race that defines me and everything.

    I got a clearer sense now than a couple weeks ago.  At first I was trying to do another slam (the midwest slam. I think I can do it, because it should be easier than the slam I did this year.  So I was arranging my schedule to fit their races in. Then I asked myself do I really want to that those races all at once, in one go, just for a bragging right? Deep down is no. I don’t carw about the bragging right. I want something that is meaningful. Something that challenge me to the next level, but not something superficially hard for the hard sake.

    There is no desire for me to the slam, or even the every first race (The Mohican). I want a race that speaks to me (calling me to run it). I don’t sense it here for the midwest slam, maybe but two races. I would like to do the Burning River and the Indiana Trail 100. It is a weird way to sign up a race, but yes, that is my way. I need a deep down conviction to do it. Almost all races I do, kind of speak to me and they draw me to them. A weird way to make a decision.

    So, I was facing like 20+ races, and I could not hear their voices over one another and it was very chaotic.  Some races have a deadline pressure to sign up before they are filled (Eastern States almost is full, though only opened two weeks ago). Some have scheduling conflict. Some are too far away or too expensive to do.

    In the end, I asked myself, what do I really want. I wanted something simple and easy. I like doing marathons. So I should go back to my root of running marathons and running just for “fun”.

    I asked a friend if they have trouble deciding which races to run. They said no. They just do it, easy. There is no agonizing over months and weeks of should I do this over that.

    I think for me, since I reached kind of stage where I was in the spotlight of becoming a runner people admire. There is a certain expectation of the next level I have to reach, to keep up with my wow factor.  I think I was caught up to it just a bit when I ran Wasatch.  I glad I finished but it was not fun to be under the pressure for pressure sake. So when I do the slam for next year, there is no need to go through the insanity. Once was enough.

    I was thinking of trying couple harder races like the Bear or the Big Horn, or The Utimate Ultra Mountain Trail Run in Europe, everyone is taking about. It seems to be a natural progression pf doing harder and harder thing. Then I said, wait a minute. I don’t have to give into the pressure. I don’t have to be an over achiever! 

    One of the best moment I had was at the Burning River this year, when I ran with a 75 year old (Mr Randy). He teased me of being a show off of wearing the 100 mile shirt I got from the weekend before. We both finished the race together.  The achievement really belonged to the man who still is doing such a big run, and not me. I had a blast to have been able to finish with him and to share in his spotlight. I think a good race is like that, where my finishing time and ranking doesn’t matter, but that I made good friends along the way.

    I am still an overachiever, no doubt about that.  Recently, I tried very hard in finishing a race that ended up back fire. I was stressed about it and temper flew. Then I asked myself, did I really enjoy such behavior of flying off my handlebar. It was just a race. So what if I did not finish it. There’s always next year! Indeed, I am doing it again.

    A beautiful day on the trail