Tag: new year

  • [697] New Year 2026

     (last year‘s Vision vs this year)

    Every year I seek for something that inspires me and propels me foward to a new year.  A few years ago, it was a combination of long distance running and standing on top of a mountain.  2024, I received it and stood on top of the high Sierra. To my wildest dream, I did the Western States. It was an unforgetable moment. Breathtaking beauty. It might have been once in a lifetime. Of course I wanted more of it after that and thinking of Leadville and The UTMB.

    I long for that in 2025.  That brought me to back Utah for the Wasatch and back to the valley of Shenandoah of Old Dominion where I did some of my hiking and running.  I hope and drive myself forward to 2026 and 2027, to seek for something  much more.  Life is exciting.

    The last 10 years, I ran 99 marathons/ultras, actually more ultras than marathons to a ratio of 2:1 (68 ultras and 30+ marathons).  I also earned 7-8 Dnfs along the way (They are races that I did not finish, all of them being ultras).  So it brings the number of races I finished around 91-90 races.  In 2026, I hope to run 9-10 races to reach the perfect 100!  That will be a milestone for sure. Or really, I won’t make a beep once I cross the 100.

    I started running in August 2016.  My 10th year running anniversary is around the corner.  Thus, I wanted to reach 100 marathons in 100 days!  Joking. But would not that be cool for 2026 though? Is it even possible, of course not. A 100 mile takes me 30+ hours to finish. Anyway…

    Here is my new year resolution:

    Resolve: 2026.001 Run 10 marathons/ultras.

    Resolve: secret goal:001.  A few years ago, I embark on plan001.  I think it is time to bring it to a close.  What is plan 001?  I almost forgot what it is.  Only last year was I think I know.

    Resolve:  2026.002. A lot of Caroline’s goals are becoming my goals. One of her goals is to visit the Grand Canyon.  Marking late March or Late November the date. Putting a circle on that.

    Resolve: 2026.003.  Visit Cape May. Put another circle on that

    Resolve: 2026.004.  Run the first landing 50k! woohoo.

    Resolve: Running is every part of my life, and as I shift from going back to my hiking adventure  instead of running, I need to resolve to hike more.  2026.005

    Resolve: I signed up for some pretty hard races, MMT, and Eastern States, Vermont 100, Devil Dog, and Hennepin. I need to train for them. Resolve to train hard for my races. 2026:06

    Resolve:  My friend Jeremy is running a 300 mile race.  I don’t know if I could be there to crew him.  I resolve to make the time to go out to Arizona to crew. 2026.07

    Resolve: 2026:008. Every year I said I would excercise more and eat healthier.  This year is the year. Same every year.

    Resolve:  2026:008.  Read the bible more.  Seek God more and be well balanced on the inside.  2025 was a tumultuous year.  I hope to get a clearer focus as 2026 and 2027 come into view.

    Resolve: 2026.009.  I settled into a grove of what to do the next year based on the stuff I did not get to do the previous year.  It was almost a cookie cutter.  I started this journey a few years ago to challenge myself to real the “next” challenge. I resolve to seek the next part.

    Resolve 2026.010.  I resolve to be clearer with my goals and vision and know my mission for the next year.  Mission is always the same.  However, it can be stated and apply differently to the new circumstances. It might need some reformulation. Finding an inspiration. Vision though has to be inspiring at least to myself.

    Resolve2026.011. I resolve to add more resolutions.  It doesn’t have to stop there.  Maybe part of my downfall is stopping short. 

    A few years ago, I read a fellow blogger on new year’s statement instead of making new year resolutions.  I came up,  borrowed a verse from the Bible:  Knock, and the Door will be open.  It has been a tremendous run with that verse alone.  It taught me to be bold and Daring.  I have not turn back on doing hard things.  I soared high beyond I could dream.  While, I would love to continue on this theme, I got a new one for 2026.

    2025 taught me my limitations and to live in what I am capable of (especially in light of my DNFs).  To some it seems a step backward, from reaching for the sky (see my plate).  I think it is part of growth of being realistic of part where I could change as well as also pushing the dream of doing great things.

    An important theme I picked up during the Virginia Marathon was:  He went leaping and jumping and praising God.  Thus, this will be my personal theme for 2026, continuing to do the impossible with joy and help others to do the impossible in the name of Jesus.  (Acts 3:8-9)

    *My dear Friend Caroline said I have two different visions for 2026 in two different places on my Blog.  I was shock, really!? where? Oh one at the Blog I wrote the other day and one at my race plan that is always being modified on the racing page.

  • Day662 Midlife crisis

    [updating a post written in 2023, might not have published back]

    oh no…January 2, I don’t have a new year resolution this year. I will resolve to be purposeful!

    This probably will be a weird post. I haven’t figured out what I want to do for this year.

    Last time I was in this state was back in 2016. I ended up buying a truck, fell in love with a woman, and somehow running a marathon (actual a 5k, but it led to signing up for a marathon). Then ended up going up a mountain like Moses, experienced a life changing event at a burning bush. No not like Moses, I did not lead his people out of Egypt afterward. I’m kind of seeing myself doing it again now.

    I still drive a truck! Loving it. People I knew started calling me Bear for my outdoors adventure image though I am nowhere near the macho-ness.

    Here am I now, what should I do?? I did all those things because they were new and hard and adventureous. They are no longer new to me now. I still love to spend time on the mountains.

    I am not into creating a new branding of myself. Usually though soul seeking time would result in remaking myself like back in 2016. Maybe I am pivoting to something new.

    I think it comes down to what is worthwhile to do. This time I think would be less dramatic. Actually, I kind of remake myself the past year.

    I need to realign my mission goal again. (I did during 2023, but it was not published).

    I still want to run across the continent. I do want to travel more. I do want to race more.

    The last few years were fun. I got myself to be an ultra marathon runner. And claimed the title of runner of the year in my running club.  It was fun. It took me longer to get where I am. I am still not very good at it but I can say, distances no longer scare me. Anything under 100 is doable. Anything over 100 is probably doable with some planning. The mystery is no longer there.  I am itching to try a 200 miler.

    It opens door to many races. What I really want to try is the Atacama Desert Crossing. I want to try some multi-day running adventures.

    Couple friends wanted to do Vol State or HOTS. Someone suggested the trilogy. I want to do the Tuscarora trail or something similar like the Mid state trail. Here I am dreaming.

    *Rim to Rim of the Grand Canyon. While driving up to Pennsylvania, my friend mentioned something she wanted to do is to hike from Rim to Rim of the Grand Canyon. I did something similar (I only hiked down to the River and back up) and at the time I was not an ultra runner yet. I don’t know if I can fit that into this year. It would be dope if I can do it. Saying this, because I would go just for a hike, even though truly I wanted to run across the Canyon and back in one day.

    Another thing I want to do this year is the Sierra Club One Day Hike (100K). I was interested in this before I was an ultra runner. At the time Hiking one day from DC to Harper Ferry seems interesting because it was impossible for me at the time. Of course if I get accepted, I would run this thing instead of hiking. Probably will take me 16 ish hours.

    I need to make more friends who is into what I am into. Meeting Caroline was something like that. We are both seeking to cross off 50 states marathon. She is like 10 states ahead in 2023. And she did it, finished all fifty states.

    Funny nothing much has changed since 2023.  My goals still are same today as two years ago. A lot of changes are in the air though, vaguely, my career, having a new roommate, moving to a new place, starting a new relationship, and future. Only till 2026 will we know.  My life might turn upside down.  I might have to put aside my personal goals for something bigger. Well I don’t have to have everything together. Once😀😛 I have a clearer picture, I will post again like I did in 2023, likely though it will be 2026 or 2027.  As I get older, pace slow down. I can’t accomplish as much as before, so 2023 goals are still 2025-2026 goals.

    A couple more resolutions

    *Be laser focused

    *overcoming my fear of starting new things

    My previous goals

    1. 2023 published version

    2. 2024 goals

    Last year, I was aiming for finishing the race called Western States.  It was everything to me.  This year, I get to cheer other people doing it. I really want to do it again or to be there.

  • [605] Redeye 50k

    Last year I had a faster finish (around 3:19 pm, and I mistakenly thought I finished at 4:45pm). I only remembered being chased by the sweeper. I did it in 7:19h, which at the time was disappointingly slow, but this year was an hour slower (8:17h). It was a fatass, meaning free race.

    Most fatasses in my mind are not real races and so usually I don’t run at my best. This year, I had both Boyers and Redeye 50k fatass with only two days apart, I did not even bother to run fast on either one.

    My goal was the same for Redeye as for Boyers, that is to maximize my time being on my feet as a training for Western States.

    I could have finish around 3 pm but I forgot how fast people normally run at Redeye. Most people managed to finish by 3 pm.

    And when I did not show up after 4 pm, the race director started to worry for me. I had assumed like last year to have until sunset (5 pm), and thus I did not push myself to go faster. Also I was with another person.

    I also missed the sweep because it was a loop course. When I finished the second loop, fhe sweeper already went out ahead of me.

    Trail ribbons were already pulled by third lap and generally, it was not an issue, but I was not completely attentive to the trail on my second loop, so I got lost on my third loop. In my mind, I thought I knew the way, but I in fact missed one of the turns at mile7. I would still have found my way even if I were completely lost, but I had to find the correct trail to be on the course and that probably costed 30 minutes or more. It was on me. However, now I am more familiar with the trails at that section.

    Last year the course was almost completely new to me. The way the race set up is we learn the course during the first two loops and on the final loop after the flagging were cleared, we would be on our own to find our way out, and many people don’t run the third loop. As an ultra runner, I took this as a welcome challenge. Welcome to the tough love of trail running for the uninitiated.

    The day was festive. Several runners who did Boyer’s 40 mile couple days before also came out for Redeye 50k. Boyers is a tougher course with 6500-7000 ft of elevation gain. Redeye only has 1000 ft per loop. So making it 3000 ft total. To us who has done Boyers, this run was super easy.

    Still we started with tired feet. I need the double day long run for my training. I had to go easy on the pace so as not to injure myself.

    Indeed, my legs were happier to tread on the hills of Redeye 50k than at Boyers. The technical section that previously caused me issues suddenly seem so much easier to handle.

    A lot of my running friends came out. I was almost the first to arrive. Tony T. was already there. Tony did Boyers too. Then there is Nick (I don’t know him but everyone seems to know the guy, and he joked of going by the name of Bartholomew). RD said he was definite that there was no such name on his list. It must have been an inside joke. The Bartholomew I heard of was Ash Bartholomew from Lucy’s Dad, YouTube video, of 2023 last runner of 2023 Western States. That story is my motivation to attempt Western States.

    Then there was Justin. He met me before, but I forgot his face. He brought his daughter out. It was a good chance for an reintroduction. They knew me from Massanutten. I was the guy who carried a bunch of hoggies (italian subway sanwiches) on my run and everyone still remembered me because of that.

    Wayne, my pacer from the devil dog, showed up not long after. Wayne also did the Boyers couple days ago. I model my training for Western States and or races after him.

    Along with him was a band of chinese runners. They were mostly from Maryland and I have seen them in the past, but usually in shorter races. We reintroduced each other again. Cheryl told me she met me at the Old Dominion while crewing for Wayne.

    Charlie, Wayne’s friend was there. We ran and trained together for the MMT (Massanutten 100) in 2023, a very hard race. Wayne and Charlie were discussing how to improve the core and bowel muscles so as not to get stomach issues during a run. They also talked about speed training. In fact, Wayne started his speed training since September. I noticed how much faster Wayne has gotten. He said, we got to mixup the training so that the body/training would not stagnate. He was talking about the mix of various things. He recommended me to do at least one session of hill training a week. Weight training as well and a speed work. He swore by MAF, something about keeping heart rate low during a run. However, but now he said that is improving too slowly, and we have to have some higher intensity on occassion. Speed work is new to me. As I said, I model my training after his because I have seen how he conquered some tough races I thought would be impossible to do.

    With all these tips, I felt my time at Redeye was well worth it. I need both knowledge and application. I got both that day.

    Loop one, I was mostly with Wayne and heard him talked on various things.

    Loop 2, Wayne took off ahead and we never caught up again. I was with his “pacer” Cheryl, at least that what most people on the course (I knew) called her or known her by during the MGM 50K, another recent race.

    Wayne had originally planned to stay with her, but even in loop 1, I realized Cheryl’s pace was too slow for Wayne but it was about right for me. So I stayed with her.

    Now Cheryl just got a brand new navigation watch but did not know how to use it. At the very first turn after leaving the aid station to start the second loop, she already made the “wrong” turn. It is a loop course so in reality it does not matter. However, I called out to her to let her know, we should be turning right instead of left. It should be a red flag that I should not stay with her.

    I knew my way around the park, especially after doing a 100 mile there twice. I was pretty sure which way was the correct way.

    Soon, there were some other runners caught up so as to confirm we were indeed going to the right way. I know some runners like Q, like to go in the reverse direction, which might have created some confussion. I think he did so to check on runners and also helped them with navigation.

    However, as long as one follows the course markings, it should be fine in going either direction except the final loop when the ribbons would be removed.

    We finished the second loop in two hours. Our first loop took us three hours (8:00-11:00). Our second loop, we were climbing up to the parking lot at 1:05. I was pretty sure, we (I) could do the next loop in 2.5 ish hours, so putting us at 3:30-4:00 pm finish.

    I got to the station, talked to people, since I was not pressed for time, there was no incentive for me to leave the station in a hurry. In hindsight, I should have left. Mike E was there. He told me the sweeper already had gone out to remove ribbons, but if we hurry, we could catch up. Cheryl said, she would not do the third loop without a guide. Since, I was generally with Cheryl on the second loop, I was willing to be a guide on the third. This was a bad idea, looking back.

    I felt we stayed at the aid station for a bit too long. Having done enough ultras, I had an internal clock to tell me when I should be leaving. Basically, if I were to stand around with nothing to do, then I have stayed too long.

    We checked the time on the way out, it was already 1:25 pm. On the third loop, My runner was much slower than earlier loop which was expected, since 22 miles ish, is the “wall” for many marathon runners. Cheryl is an excellent marathoner, but was not immuned to it. I was not hit with the same fatique because I was not going fast that day, also I have a higher tolerant for distances.

    I had expected my runner to be able to keep up with me. While I am a slow runner, my purpose that day was for my own training. By going slower than my normal pace, pretty much made my training less effective. Though, I was aiming for time on my feet.

    Her speed almost matched my walking pace. I did not mind, as long as she was still strong and moving. All the flaggings were indeed gone. There were like two to three runners behind us (They were Cheryl’s friends) but they were like 5 mins apart. In hindsight, I should have left her with them.

    By one hour mark, I checked on Cheryl, if she wanted to head back, we could still turn around before the halfway. At the time it seemed like a joke to turn around. We chose to keep going forward because distance wise is the same in either direction. Now looking back, turning around might have been a better choice because the directions to get back were still fresh but going forward we had more unknowns such as the chances of getting lost.

    Then, I met a fellow Devil Dog’s runner, Vladamir. We roomed together before the race at the Devil Dog. He was the second place finisher. I was glad he still remembered me. He was taking his family on a hike. I knew we were near the exit to Burma Road, maybe a mile or two and then we would be nearing the finish, because usually people with families would not be far from the trailhead.

    We took a left on the Burma Road and crossed a road to get to Taylor’s Farm Rd. From there, we should be within 3-4 miles to the finish.

    This section gets hilly. We continued on Taylor’s Farm passing Blacktop road (I don’t know the name at the time but I knew where it would lead). Note, we will meet it again later at Old Blacktop Rd.

    There was doubt whether we should be turning at the road. Cheryl doubted and stopped to check her navigational watch. I was pretty sure here we had to go straight, because making a right there would bring us to Camp Gunny on the Devil Dog course. I am 100% familar with the Devil Dog course and camp Gunny was not where we wanted to be headed toward.

    I was not following the gps course, but my memory from the previous loops. The course was marked a little differently this year at that section.

    I knew we would pass a foot bridge soon, which we did. We came to the foot bridge and made the climb uphill.

    My mistake was I forgot I needed to make a left turn after the bridge but continue onward for maybe a mile. Last year, I think we made the turn further down at the yellow blazed trail. There were two trails crossing our path we were on. At the time, my mind was drawing blank. When I passed the orange blazed trail I made a mental note, but I didn’t slow down to check the trail’s sign post there. In my mind, we still had further to go. As for how far, I did not remember and I was hoping to see something to jog my memory. I know in hindsight that was not the best thing to do. A better way is to check the map, which I did have with me.

    I believe, I might have gone about a mile. Cheryl caught up to me and said the trail was unfamilar to her. Actually, she had been complaining the whole Taylor’s Farm section, because her watch went off.

    She was absolutely right, my mind was still drawing blank of where we needed to turn. The trail did not seem to be the same. So I checked my phone. I did not download the gpx track before the start and my phone would not download it anyway because it always strips off the .gpx extension and my mapping program would not load the file without the extension.

    I had Google map in offline mode, which had saved me many times in other trail runs. From the Google map, I determined we were off course. Her watch showed as much, however, she did not know how to get us back on course. Cheryl insisted we to go back to the previous road crossing or use the google map directions, which as readers know do not work for trails.

    I presented her the options. I do vaguely knew where I was even though she doubted my directions. We had three choices at the time. One, to continue forward, I knew it would intersect a road where cars drive on. and we could either walk back to camp ot get picked up 2, to do Cheryl’s plan by going back to the previous gravel road, to make the turn she was insisting of turning, 3rd, was for me to find the correct trail of the course and finish the race

    Note, in either option 1 and 2nd option, I only would lead her to the road and she would be on her own. 1st option would be the safest and fastest for Cheryl. 2nd option I knew was a definitely the wrong way and we would only get deeper into the woods, but Cheryl did not believe me and she wanted me to go that way with her. I would not.

    For me, I could do either 1 or 3. I prefer 3 because I knew we were not that lost. 2 miles were easy for me to make up. We still had time since it was 3:30 pm then. I know, we supposed to be back by then, but things like this happened.

    I could get out quicker, but we could only moving as fast as she could manage.

    I was not too tired. I knew if I run it, I could be out in 30 mins to an hour by covering 2-4 miles distance. I could make it by 4 pm, but I was not so sure about Cheryl could keep up. At this time, she was not able to run but walk. It was 20-25 min pace. We had about 3 miles left.

    It was her first time being lost in the woods. She later described it as being “devastated.”

    I led her onto the Turkey Ridge Trail and she said, this looked like the trail at the beginning of the loop and was checking if that was the right way. She was trying to convince me to turn around again. However, I was sure where I was heading and stopped talking to her. She only expressed more doubts and confussion.

    I vaguely remembered being on blue, then orange and then yellow and white (blazes). Since missing the Turkey Ridge Trail earlier, I stopped at every sign post and read all their arrows and directions and distances. I was glad they gave ample information and I knew in general, I was back on course, though I had about 5-10% reservation. I mostly checking the post to know how many miles to the finish.

    Mike, a friend, who was volunteering that day, called me to check since it was already past 4 pm. Later, he told me that the runners who were behind us had came in and so he knew something had happened when we didn’t show up.

    I gave them my location saying we were on Turkey Ridge heading toward the campground.

    Once we reached the campground, I saw two parked forest ranger vehicles. I presented Cheryl another option, if she does not want to hike out, and believes we are still lost, she could ask one of the rangers for a ride back. Two miles probably would take only a few minutes in a car instead of having to run out.

    She said she recognized the place now.

    We got on the white blaze trail (I think was the South Valley trail). To me, this trail for sure would lead us to the finish. I still was being extra careful. Every turn, I would look and read all the signs. I made all the correct turns and got us back to the swinging bridge. I gave Mike another call saying we reached the Bridge (the Bridge was where we entered/exited the loop, a key location). Mike understood we were only half mile out and should arriving within 10 minutes. There was only one last hill to climb to the parking lot. I got us out.

    Lessons learned. I regretted taking a new person with me. I don’t mind being lost, because it was part of the training, but because I had to slow down my pace for another person, my training was not as productive.

    For Cheryl or anyone new to trail running, be always prepare when going into the woods, always carry enough water, food (calories), expect to be weak and tired and getting lost, expect being longer than planned, carry a map, dress warm, know the directions even when the course is marked, have a contingency plan, and carry a phone. Absolutely, be selfsufficient. I carried all those, but my runner did not, and it hampered our pace and could have ended much worse.

    We eventually got out of the woods. We have gone for 8+ hours (one hour longer than planned). We managed to finish before sundown. Cheryl’s friends were still there. Mike and Caroline joined in a brief celebration of a friend’s birthday. It all ended well. They did not have to send out rescuers for us.

    Epilogue: Cheryl though was shaken, but her spirit is not broken. She plans to do more trail running and has already signed up for the first MMT training (coming in a week), which takes some serious high level of ultra trail skills.

  • Day525 resolve

    New Year is already here! I am behind on making my resolutions. I am not a big fan of making resolutions because I usually fail after a few days. I also the type of person who needs to have them because I love structure.

    I did not start the year with a bang, but I did start it off running. Seriously, I ran a 50K on January 1st. I still need to write a report on that.

    In other areas besides running though, I have some “debts” to repay. I felt behind on a bunch of things. There are two race reports to write! I need to prepare for several trips this spring (Texas, Canada, Outer Banks, Roanoke, and Massanutten). One is next month and I haven’t reserved my flight. And most importantly, I need to refocus myself for this new year.

    Originally, I was going let it slides, like I have been for the last few years. This year was going to be like the year before. It is not far from the truth. Same old same old. I figured the previous year resolutions should do for this year.

    However, after reading some other people posts, I want to give this year a serious thought. I lile from RunningOnFumes of choosing a word or phrase for the year. For me, I would like 2023 to be *resolved*. Hopefully, I’ll reach some goals.

    SeizeLife at LiveTheMoment/EatTheMoment mentioned about 168 plan. We have 168 hours total in a week. How do we use it? I Googled and downloaded the spreadsheet. Basically, it helps listing out what things are important and ideally helps you to focus your time to have a fulfilling week. I will look into it and hopefully will use it.

    Resolve 2023.1 – practice and use the 168 plan

    I know People/cities die for lack of vision. I live by purpose. I want it to be meaningful.

    The last few years I have been quite unfocused. I tried aiming toward a target to transition from road running to trail running, and it took over three whole years to do it. Looking back, it wasn’t bad, just me stumbling through life.

    What does this mean? Running 100 mile races helped me understand pace degradation. You know I could run a marathon between 4-5 hours, 26 miles. In my head, I know the pace. Miles just fly by. Every couple hours, you get 12 miles.

    But in a hundred mile, you experience the pace slowing down. In your mind you still want and hope to run a 12-13 min mile pace. Reality is your body is moving much slower.

    When I run, I set goals, like by what time, I should be at a certain place. Pace elongation stretches out the time. a five minute wait becomes 10, and 10 mins becomes 20 and so on. It seems a step taken should be closer in distance to the finish yet would take much longer time to get there. The famous Zeno’s Paradox! Every step only brings me half the distance closer but never reach it.

    This is how I feel with planning the last three years. Originally, things I wanted to do in 2018/2019, finally only got them done last year. Yes, what or why did it take me so long!

    I still love setting resolutions! Eventually, I will get there right? I recheck my to-do bucket list and glad some of them are finally coming off it. Yet there are still so much more to do.

    This morning I was exploring from 100 mile races in the Philippines! They have The Hard 100 – they give 40 hours to do. So it got to be hard. I want to do it! Now I am aware of it, it probably will take couple years for me to get there.

    Three years ago, I would not dare to dream about running this 100 mile race, but now, ya, it is more about when I can go and how it will fit into my schedule.

    Last night, I met up with David, my running friend who has been doing runs and races together this past year, and we were talking about tons of races through out the night. One of our mutual friend wanted to her first (half/full) marathon. We were excited of sharing our knowledge. At the same time, I was checking my schedule to see how they would fit in, because I want to run races with them. Our friend Siri has interesting idea of going to the spa and hot pot after “our” race — DC rock n Roll, which I haven’t signed up yet.

    Marathons on my new lists to check out is Las Cruces in NM, Burlington in VT, Space Coast Coco Beach in FL. I can’t do the first two yet because of scheduling conflict this year, but Space Coast is a possibility!

    Oh yeah what about my resolutions?

    I resolve – 2023.2 – to not be lazy with my training, specifically waking up in the morning to train

    2023.3. plan better

    2023.4. sit down and get my Annapurna trip together. It is supposed to be this year but I am so scared with the planning

    2023.5. put sydney marathon on my planner. I could definitely go this year, because my schedule is open, but need to take that step to make it happen. Also so scared about travelingbout the country. Going oversea isn’t scary but how to meet up with my cousins and auntie there, is. idk, it should be excited, but i’m shy.

    2023.6. mexico trip: likely won’t happen this year, but good to dream to run with Ramamuri (Tarahumara). Caballo Blanco Ultra 50 mile in March. From The book Born to Run. One of my favorite ultra running books to read.

    2023.7. walk the talk (resolve to get things done). Pretty much this year theme. Resolve to resolve.

    conclusion: the whole post is about to get myself to make some goals and they don’t usually get done on my time table. This leads me to not make more goals. However, I should look hard and get my things done. So I made some new year resolutions. Let’s be bold!

  • Day524 End of the year

    Last couple weeks, a recurrently theme and more like a question to myself, was what am I going to do next.

    I do know and at the same time not know. I could fake an answer, but I cannot to lie to myself.

    For running, I have a long to-do list. I always wish I could share it all. I call it my rainbow table because it is in multicolor of order of importance of which race I want to do. I do keep a year or two of races on here, though the list is not as pretty.

    While the list is like the most practical things of when the rubber meets the road, it sometimes does not immediately tell the bigger picture.

    That is – when I look at my list, instead of it giving me excitement, it sends me a feeling of dread and being overwhelmed. Maybe I am doing too much.

    I got to remind myself — The reason why we all do something is because we love it and passionate about something. At 50000 ft, I do love running. Even down to the street level, I do love it – like if there is a weekend 5k or 50k I do it.

    As a matter of fact, this coming weekend, there is a 50k, called Redeye, and I signed up. It is called Redeye because it will take place on New Year day, after a whole night of celebration, and the race assumes no one has time to sleep. I am running it like it is a local 5k. It is local to me. It will be on the same course as one I did my Devil Dog 100. I told my friend Caroline, I had that course memorized. My feet would know where to go. She was wondering if I am ready for it.

    The last few days, the top things on my mind is not so much if my body is ready for a race, which normally is, but much more what I am doing with myself on a more fundamental level.

    This kind of questions pops up to me from time to time, especially right after a big race. Just like last time back in May when I had soul searching questions, I’d reread my older blog posts. They helped. I reread last year vision statements (or new year resolutions – the ABC. They helped.

    What is ABC? it is not an accronym. It is just the name I gave to a series of blog posts at the beginning of 2022. The first one started with A, then B, so forth. I found time and again rereading them, reset me. They made me feel better. The gist of it is as follow.

    I realize something of what kept me going this year and the last few years is hope. My hope rests on that I will improve and I will get to do greater things even though I am not there yet.

    The fact is 2022 was not that great when I planned it. Nor has it been since the start of the pandemic. It is like I could not do anything. Now the pandemic is kind of over, I am asking what 2023 will be like. Could I plan to do something awesome? That I am kind of don’t know any more. Maybe I lost the meaning of what awesome is. Maybe that what 2023 is for me to find that out.

    This is what I thought awesome used to be.

    I mentioned some bigger things I wanted to do — some of them are near impossible, but some are definitely doable. I wanted to run across America, to run across Tennessee, to hike the Appalachian Mountain, to travel to Napal and do the trek there, to visit Alaska and paddleboat there, to run a marathon in Sydney, and maybe some day run around the world.

    Granted I am doing none of these next year or even the next few years. I haven’t done any of them this year or last year. The easiest on the list is probably going to Alaska or Sydney. I haven’t done them because of the cost.

    But I settled something closer to home. I am planning to do a marathon in Toronto. I signed up already. It is set in May. I got one of my friends, well Craw team member, (who lives near there) to join me. Caroline, also excited when I told this to her. Not sure if she is serious about following me to Toronto. I plan to mention the trip to the rest of my Craw team maybe, maybe, they would too, join me in Toronto.

    What is Craw? Craw is (or was) a virtual race in which we run around the world from the comfort of our home. We are about two weeks away from finishing. Since the theme is running around the world, we should at least do some traveling. I set Toronto my destination.

    Back to the bigger picture. When I wrote up my race recap (twice), I came to the question, what will I do next. My answer and I did not want to say at the time, was same old same old. Basically same as we always done. This year was like last year. Next year will be like this year. We race.

    I was asking myself where is my excitement now. Unlike 5 years ago, I was brimming with joy then. It was until I reread my vision statement. Yes, there are bigger goals out there. And doing these tiny goals maybe in some ways gets me to the bigger ones or at least kind of replace them. It is just like doing the Craw — none of us will ever get a chance to actually literally run around the world, but if we imagine it, we do and could run around the world even from our own home. Yes it is not the same, but the illusion could get you pretty close. Doing the small goals, we could imagine ourselves doing the bigger ones.

    I will leave it as that for now. I don’t have the answer. We try our best to find our next step.

    All said and done, I hope this helps me and others to come up with their new year resolutions. By the way, I need to think up some. Happy new year!

  • catching up

    Day 212

    I was just looking back at last year resolutions, to get some ideas for this year. They were not bad.

    1. eating healthier – kind of did that. At least during July and August, I cooked my own meals.

    2. train more consistently – I certainly stepped on my runs last year, while giving going to the gym.

    3. Make new friends, yes. I deepened my relationship with couple people and it was rewarding experience. Some are online like you dear readers.

    4. camping by myself – yes, I went to Wild Oak and ran the loop, while camping the night before all by myself. I planned some smaller trips (like Seattle). The Patagonia trip, though didn’t plan or led it myself, it was definitely very challenging and rewarding.

    5. saving money – ahh. 2019 was unbelievable in term of investing and numbers by measurement aspect, and made quite a gain myself. Yet I spent significantly more and my earned income was not that much to begin with, so I was near the point of being bankrupt after my trip to Chile. I think I have less money in the bank now than when I was in college!

    I had to stop eating out for a while and I was digging up food from over the places. I found cooked meals left in the company freezer I prepared back in July and ate those. Of course, I got sick after I ate them. I found frozen chicken breasts in the freezer from also July. I cook those too and got sick as well after eating. Any way, I survived. That was my start of the new 2020!

    Also I was begging a coworker of mine for money for a race. I run ‘Run my heart Out’ every February, but this year, I don’t have the money yet to pay for it. It is $40-50 depending if I get the early registration. My coworker rolled her eyes. I should put up a go fund me.

    A joke for all runners each new year is we all try to run as many races we can afford and a few we can’t.

  • First day of the new year

    I was blessed to run in a race on the first day of the new year. I signed up for a free 5k race hosted by DC Mayor Muriel Bowser. It was a high quality race even though it was free. We got a free technical T-shirt and finisher medal. The race was timed. The course was new to me. A lot of people showed up. The whole city showed up…I think at least couple thousands.  (more…)