In awe

Tag: quarterly

  • [633][24.16] Midterm rewind

    Looking back at my last pause, [Day600], about six months ago, I don’t have much to say today.  This one won’t do justice compares to the previous one. Maybe because there is not much time separation.  I know I had a great six months, but it is too much to dive in. The next six months will be even more critical how my plan will turn out. So, I don’t want to brag too much of the first half of the year, fearing the second half I won’t able to reach as high as I did already.

    The year, or my training to be exact, started off slowly.  The main goal was to train for the Western States 100.  This race is in two weeks, depending when this post will be published.  The end is in sight. I have no idea how it will turn out but I was not as nervous as 6 months ago. At least I am confident I have a good chance of finishing it. (Race report will be posted soon)

    As for my other goals (races), I had done well.  I ran many races. Almost in my opinion, since I haven’t counted up, I ran as many races as my entire 2023 in the first half of 2024.  I am happy and as well as tired. More excited overall.  I was not going to go for the grand slam six months ago but as things played out, I am going for it now.  First of the four grand slam races is done.  So, I am going for it. 3 more will take place over the summer.

    My hardest race so far was the Massanutten 100 (MMT), not part of the slam.  Well it was my personal slam (or triple crown, C&O, MMT, and OD).  I trained for MMT last year and I did the same this year. The result was not as good as last year. It was unexpected.  I had the race locked in to finish with a good time but it slipped out of me at the final moment. I still finished but it was tough physically.  It took every ounce of me to reach the end. The race just wore me out.  We could blame the wet weather but to me I don’t think that affected me much during the race. My feet were fine.  I did not have blisters or anything, I was just out of energy. I even had a good crew helping me this year too. Anyway, I will leave the monday quarterbacking for another time. The full report of it already was written. I was grateful, I got it done and had a memorable time. And I was in good health.

    Other major races were, OD100, C&O100, and the Taiwan WJS Marathon. I did very well in all of them.  I ran a bunch of smaller races and training runs too. Unfortunately, many were forgotten at this point. They are written down somewhere, so I can always go back to read them, like Seneca, Bull Run Run, Naked Bavarian, and Mid-Maryland.

    My trip to Taiwan was memorable.  It was my second international marathon.  I was pleased how it turned out compares to my first international marathon.  I did not have a concrete plan six months ago (well I signed up the race in October), but glad everything fell into place.

    Running has kept me busy through the spring. I have not had any time to pause for planning, like what I will be doing next year or even for the fall.  As readers know, I paused my regular marathon race schedule, to make this year focusing on running 100 milers. So, I need to see how to line up my marathon races once again.  It feels like a big task.

    It is easy to pencil in races.  But my way of making decisions is I only run a race if I really have a strong emotional tie to it.  I need a strong draw from the race in order to sign up.  Getting this strong feeling is harder when I am distracted with many other races. Yes, it is a weird way of making decisions. The past six months, I had nothing but constant motion. And it is so little time left for soul searching decision, jk. Yes, making the decision of which races to run is a serious business for me each summer.

    Anyway, I have no further things to say.  I hope to build up my savings again for future trips.  I made a big travel over the spring to Taiwan (and Sydney). It is easy to spend money but took me a long time to save up.  I still want to travel more, such as to do the trek in Napal when I am still physically fit.  Grand Canyon, while I have been there couple times, I will want to go back there again, at least, to attempt the Rim to Rim (to Rim) hike/run in one day.  Not sure if this is a near term of a long term plan.  At first, I did not have anyone to do this with, but now, likely things are falling in place.  Yes, I need to get my finance and time available to do this.  The globe trekkers buddies were itching for a trip too.  I went with them to most of my international trips. Not sure if I will join them, though likely not.  I am nowaday prefer solo traveling.

    Those are some longer terms challenges.  My short term challenges are still the same: train and finish up the year races.  It is like an iceberg.  I did 3 big 100s but there were like 7 more.  I lost count.  My pacer at OD100, tried to help me count them, and came to about 7 races are left.

    Heart.  Passion.  Motivation.  I struggle with this in the past. When I am doing too much, I lost sight of the vision why I am doing them. Along with, I am losing the passion of doing things.  I only do things because I like doing them. And if the passion is not there, I don’t want to do it. I think that is the biggest issue for the next six months and the next year is to keep my passion up.

  • Re(view) 23:14 [Day575]

    Midterm review / Summer-Fall 2023

    Summer has gone by too fast for me. The last review was around April (Re 23:13). The goal back then was to train to run faster for the Iron Mountain 50, especially Grindstone 100.

    Let just say, it has not been easy. I have gotten slower instead of faster. I blame my left foot, which still gives me problem. I DNF’d in couple races. And Grindstone is about two weeks away.

    I started the summer full of confident from having conquered the MMT100 (finished under 35 hours), and I finished the Blackbeard 100 (OBX) last march in 28 hours. I felt I could now tackle any 100 miler. I felt I have matured in tge sport.

    I went and signed up for Burning River 100 thinking it is comparable easy like Blackbeard and I should not have trouble of finish it.

    As superstition has it, I took the finishing photo before runing the race, and I was thinking, it would be an embarassment if I don’t finish, and so it turned out to be a self-fulfilling prophesy. I stopped after 28-ish hours at mile 86-ish (I ran 89). It was a mess of a race. It rained heavily as the race got underway. I was soaked thrpugh and through. I was not prepared for the rain, and did not pack as many sets of dry clothes as I should. I had shirts but no extra shorts and underpants or socks. It was a struggle throughout the day. I was severely chafed by mile 26. I felt several times. The trail was muddy and slicked. I did not wear proper trail running shoes. It was like skiing downhill. During one fall, I might have rolled my ankle and it was swollen by midnight. And I could no longer run. It was as bad as could be.

    One of the lessons learned was I “over”-trained before the race and did not taper and so during my big race, I was out of reserve. By midnight, I was pretty much done. There was no reaching deep in my heart to draw out that energy to push me through. I slogged through the night only moving another 20 miles. It was too little too late. I DNF (did not finish/cut) when I failed to reach the last few aid stations in time. My pacer was pleading, it is just half a marathon left, which on a typical day, would be a morning run. Shout out to an amazing pacer, Amanda.

    Burning river 100 left a big impression in me (full report here). I will definitely will do it again. This was one example of how my whole summer was.

    The other race I DNF’d was the Iron Mountain 50. (report can be found here). My summer was supposed to run faster so I could do this race. Somehow, maybe the time required to recover from the Burning River and also from an earlier 100 mile race (MMT), I was not able to train as much on speed as I should. Iron Mountain was a bloodshed. I was destroyed. I finished an hour later than my goal. Good thing was I was not injured from the race.

    As for other races, I ran the Catherine’s Furnace 50K more as a training run. It took me 10 hours to do it. Normally, I should/could run it in 6-ish hours. I did not really write a report. This is as close as it get.

    An highlight of my summer was I went to Toronto and ran the Toronto Marathon. It was not a fast time, but I was pleased. The report can be found here. Note, my report was mostly negative, but due to other reasons.

    As for other races, MMT100, OSS/CIA50, Catoctin 50K, readers can read their reports. I am tired so not going to write much on those. They were all good race.

    So what is ahead? Fall season is about to start. I have plenty of races, both big and small ones. Grindstone 100 is ahead. Devil Dog 100 is in December. I have been reluctant to commit to 2024 so I have not signed up too many races for next year especially the 100 mile races. I promised to help my friend at what to be her last 100 mile race, Cowboy 100 in Nebraska. More on this as the date approach.

    Red Dirt 100 is in February. Burning River 100 is in July. I plan to run MMT 100 again in May. Iron Mountain 50 in September. Cowboy 100 is in September too, but I won’t be competing, so won’t be stressed out about it.

    As for marathons, I will run a few of those. My goal is always the same – to run faster so that I could finish some harder races, and not be embarrassed. I don’t mind the DNF, but it is a like a mosquito bite of plain annoyance of not being able to finish when I feel I could do it.

    I have an international trip planned. Likely will be a marathon in Taiwan.

    Conclusion if any, I am a bit jaded after this summer. I kind of see it coming. I am still in love to run and run far, but I am a bit at lost of which race to run. I know which race I want to run, but I am not as aggressive as before. I don’t want to run because I have to; I want to run because I am passionate about doing it. My nightmare is might fall out of love with my running and next year might be my last year.

    My next review will be 6 months from now (early January or February). I will likely do and end of the year thing, new year resolutions, and an anniversary post.

  • Day500 Yay! 500

    TL;DR – A regular title Review 22.12 would be enough for my highlighted events since last year (Day450). No I did not run 500 races.

    When I reread the last 50-day report of Day450, my two 100 mile races stood out. Honestly, I couldn’t top it this year. I have two 100 mile races this year too, but one of them, I already DNF’d (did not finish) it and the other I have not yet run, and it is not out of this world exciting nor do I have the confident that I will finish it! They are hard.

    In 2022, I faced with one setback after another. I don’t mean injuries, but that too. It was bad early in the year when I had to limp around and running was out of the question. I mean when I was all healed up, my performance was more than desired. I was struggling with my weight issue notwithstanding. Nothing seemed to go right. Slowly, I rebuilt my strength and speed. It was not enough for my two A-races. No, they were more S-tier races. I am not sad or mad about it. If you know, I wanted to challenge myself by stepping it up. Indeed I did.

    I have been saying that I have been doing goals that were relatively easy, achievable and 100% risk-free. There was almost no risk of failures. I started to dream up goals by adding 25% beyond what I think is reasonable and tried them. I stretched myself to goals that are a bit beyond me. This season, these two races truly tested me. For this reason, the races were tantalizing close within my grasp. I got what I asked for.

    I am happy with my progress. It is hard to show “no result” and call that good. But it is. I guess in the end it is the process that matters more. Got to remind myself that.

    Which races I am talking about? The MMT – Massanutten Mountain 100. I trained very hard for this at the beginning of the year. I was on the borderline of making it happened (like actual finishing it). In the end, I was just within 15 minutes behind the final cutoff and five mile away from getting the buckle. Again, I am not mad. I wrote many posts on it. My full report of the race can be found here.

    Second one was the Iron Mountain. I was also so close of getting this race under 12 hours. I know it can be done. I was also within the 15-20 minute window. I just need to be a bit of a stronger runner. I trained for this race over the summer. There is nothing much to say. My Report of the race can be found here.

    I am so thankful I had the chance to run both races. Awesome experience and the friends I made. Regardless their outcomes, I did what I set out to do. Just fell short that’s all. It was all part of the plan. I don’t plan to fail but it was also expected. I had fun and enjoyed doing them. I sometimes feel salty about them, but it will all pass. I got to move on. This is something I learned recently. Everything is temporary. Victories or defeats, they all pass.

    Many of my events for this year were very similar to last year. I did Rock n the Knob again for the third time (report). I did the Richmond’s Dominion Power River Rock trail fest for the third time too (no reports written for any of the years). I mentioned these because I had a lot of fun there. Also I am still pursuing my 50 states marathon goal. This is a multi year adventure. I went to Minnesota (for Grandma’s in Duluth) this summer. And I went Ann Arbor (the report not yet published). In a couple weeks, I will add another state (keeping it quiet for now, but I hope to get New Jersey, fingers crossed). Slowly but surely, I am getting my 50 states done, whether it will be in the next 5 or 10 years. I wrote about a bunch of them in my last (semi-official) quarterly report (Day490), which was a long post.

    The quarterly report of Day 490 got me back on track and gave me a new impetus for the fall season.

    meta: I was glad for doing some soul searching on Day490. As going forth, I plan to write a report around every 10-15 days or so, to be more in line with the timing. I figured I need that quarterly reminder.

    Many things have happened since. I ran the Iron Mountain as mentioned. My August month was mostly training for that race (I made several trips down to Iron Mountain). In July, I ran the Catoctin. What did I do in June? I went to Minnesota, and ran the Grandma’s.

    What else did I do? I don’t remember other than running. Spring came fast. Then summer and now fall. I traveled a lot but mostly for running. Places that were far last year, no longer seem that far. I had mostly peace in my family since my mom has recovered (it was a year since she had her stroke).

    I finished the Gvrat (The Tennessee Rat Race) for the third time, running across Tennesee virtually. Note, it is actual running but not at the actual location. The excitement was not the same as the first or second year when I did it. I only did the bare minimum to get my 640 miles in over the summer for the award (a medal). In comparison, the first year, I did over 1000 miles. The second year, I did two crossings (that is 1300 miles). I was hoping to do more this year. Surprisingly, I did less this year. 640 miles is still whole lot of miles to many people.

    I am also part of the Craw Race (running around the world, virtually). After three years, we are about to finish. Similar to the Gvrat, the fervor has gone down quite a bit since we started. My original team is intached but one. Some other teams had disbanded or became too slow to finish. We are still trucking. We have only 2000 ish miles left (a month or two away). I confess we are struggling with our miles. Half of the team are injured or recovering. Some are sick, Covid too hampered our team. Plus, I bet the general life struggles is taking a toll. There are a few old guards who trudge on–that is the ultra running spirit. We likely will finish it by the end of this year. Currently our team is near the Canadian border, and we will cross into the US and then run to the Mexico border, where we all started. Winter is coming. Last year, we were bogged down by the cold.

    The last few weeks, I have been running in one event after event. I am overjoyed with so many runs, such as LakeRidge 12 hr., Rock n the Knob, and Pemberton 24. Their reports are somewhere here: 1, 2, 3.

    I still have many more races to come before the year ends. Maybe 4-5 more. I met a 62 y.o. woman (Caroline) who got me into a race in December (Naked Nick). She is an amazing avid runner. She races ever weekend just like me. I met another lady (Tek) who runs 100 miles like I run marathons. She doesn’t get tired. I have to suck it up.

    Normally, I don’t run when it is cold. It is getting cold. Now, oh a race, sign me up. There is Stone Mill 50 in November (a yearly tradition for me so far, my 3rd time) and lastly the fearsome Devil Dog 100. I won’t talk about this now.

    What about next year? I will publish it soon before the end of the year. But most important one is, I have OBX (Black Beard’s Revenge) as my biggest race. Then I’ll try to go to Canada to have my “international debut!” at the Toronto Marathon (I haven’t decided which one, May or October; October’s TCS Waterfront is more preferred). I wish to get a couple new states in but traveling is becoming costly. I have no plan yet which state to go to, maybe Georgia or North Carolina. Personally, I still want to go to Tulsa, OK except the airfare is so expensive (and I want a direct flight).

    One important thing recently I have asked myself is why am I doing this? To others it seems I have lost my mind with so many races. The answer I came up is because I love it. I actually wrote up a blog entry but haven’t published it.

    Looking even longer down the road, maybe for 2024, I want to do some big crossings, such as the 4 deserts race – Atacama Crossing. I am also thinking of crossing TN, Tennessee for real, as in the Last annual Vol State or Heart of the South if I get in that is. I also have the Nepal trip on the backburner, which was supposed to be for 2023. Plus maybe a Sydney Trip for the Sydney Marathon. There are so many races I want to do. Any one of these is a bucket list item for me. Not likely if I get any of these done but I can certainly dream.

    This past week, a similar idea came up while I was listening to classical music on my way to work. Haydn wrote 104 of symphonies, and he definitely is a prolific muscian. That is a mind bloggling number. Why? Because he was good at it and loved doing what he was doing. I don’t see myself as Haydn, but my running is like an opus. It is my work of art. I can’t get tired of running in another race. I want more of them. Maybe 104 more.

    Sorry, I digress. 2022 is not like 2021, I reached my highs and my lows. I don’t have regrets even for races that seemed to be a failure. I accepted them. Some might say, I reached my limit. I think they are just minor setbacks, bumps along the road. They are part of the journey.

    The post is long enough, I know some is wondering what about the Ann Arbor Marathon race report I just ran the past weekend! We want to know how it went, some would say. It is coming soon ™ I promise.

  • Day490 Q review, Tw4

    TLDR – a review of last quarter of my races and a reminder to myself that of some resolutions made at the beginning of the year

    Briefly, this week training went well. We are still experiencing the heat wave but it is getting cooler. I finally got myself outside during day time. I started to adapt to the heat. I had a big long run (30 miles) on Sunday. I had a lot of joy, in just running and not care for time or where I was going. My training started to fall into a regular schedule, which is good. This coming weekend, I will be going on for another training run on the Iron Mountain Trail. Hopefully, I will give a report. I had a lot of fun last month when I went there for my training. This will be my last training for the IMTR.

    As promised over the last few post, I said I need to pause to do a “quarterly” review. Yes, it has been more than a quarter, but a review is in order.

    While pondering what to write for my review, a couple previous posts got my attention because someone recently read them and I got a notification from their likes. I usually don’t pay attention to WP notifications because likely they are bots that are scanning my posts, but I was wondering what those posts were about, and interestingly they kind of what on the topic of what I am seeking to do at this moment. They spoke to and reminded me of my purpose. I will reference them below.

    I mentioned I need a time to review where I am heading or if I am achieving my start of the year resolutions. To be honest, I don’t remember what they were. And indeed, if I don’t know, it is a perfect time to pause to readjust my direction. Here from Day457, I resolved

    1. run more. Run first thing in the morning
    2. run faster. 4:15 marathon…is that faster than last year?
    3. run farther
    4. run longer
    5. be more organized (strategic) on my runs

    Personally, I feel I am headed in a right way. Maybe it a stronghead trait of me, to never admit that I am lost. To be honest, I have not earnestly try to accomplish any of my resolves. I intentionally made them less precise at the beginning of the year. As to why, maybe for another day.

    Day422 (Moonlight rambling) interestingly was on looking back and looking ahead in 2021. Nothing much have changed this year. I still am doing virtual races, the same ones such as running across Tennessee for the third year in a row and also I’m at the end of the second year of running around the world (CRAW), with two out twelve regions remain. I am still very busy. We will finish it by the end of thos year. In fact, I am busier because full blown in-person races are happening again and I signed up as many as I can afford. Last year was kind of a wait-and-see mode, this year, we are back in business boyz. The pandemic restriction is over. The issue noted in that entry of me not keeping a short note of each day/week/month of events, is still true. I haven’t started back logging my daily day to day journal. There were not enough time each day to do what I want. I know it never will. I still miss keeping those type of journaling. They are like mini prayers, and often show how I have changed over time. Journal for me kind of serve like a prayer book. They are my goals and wishes of things I wish to change or get done. (more on this at a later post, about city map, how people change). By not writing, I haven’t made much plans of the future either, other than my race schedule. In general, I know what I will be doing. I have spreadsheets, a bucket list, to-do lists and such, for long term planning. I shared many of my dreams here already, and they are no secret. Readers can read my previous two posts (e.g. Day488, Day489 and Day479). I am seeking thrills and sonething big enough to shake my world. Ever since I started blogging, I am on this mission of changing myself to do better and run farther. This is pretty much my resolution this year. I think, I was being less precise is to step back and see where things will lead. Basically if taken to the n-th degree, I am hoping running around the world…(a dream, but likely a reality maybe). I want to be in Awe.

    In the post, I mentioned how easy to get distracted and wander away from the initial goal. In a way, I am getting sidetracked this year with social media especially with twitch.tv. I spent way too much time and money on it than being outside running. I spent in total so far about $3000 on running but I spent twice that amount on Twitch. It is insane, where $5 here and there goes. Their subscription fee is $5, per channel, but often time, I got pulled into giving other people a subscription in what they called subathon — marathon is my thing, and so I was into giving out subs. Bottom line is a lot money. Yep, follow the money and you know where my priority lies.

    It is not that I have a problem with twitch.tv. It is interesting and all. Twitch does well in providing a sense of community and give me causes to rally around. I started out following a gamer and then couple musicians and now artists. Two illustrators, whose channels I am active in are lunariaa and wakalaka4eva. Shouting out to them. Please do give them a follow on Twitch and any their other social media platforms. They are indeed worthy of the support. As for me, I need to learn to “balanc” (waka’s community word), leaning back toward my objective, that is to run more, and devote more my time toward it. (seesaw analogy). Everything in moderation.

    Day439, (Interlude) is another interesting post at a time when everything was about to go crazy around me because fall season were about to start and my mom’s illness at the time but me in a bind. That was almost my last review of the year (note, Day450 was the last review) and came quite timely, because I am definitely about to head back into that period this year, because I signed up similar races all over again. I am in an interlude at this moment. I can identify I am in similar position with all the races happened last spring and with many races to come in the fall. Now I am at a time when I don’t have any races until Fall.

    Looking back, stuff (races) I did in 2021 were unique. It was a pop-off year for my running. I reached a level I couldn’t repeat this year. I tried, but this year was not the same. They were new, exciting, and creative! (artist word). This year, I am less creative. Maybe more about this in a future post, of how I see my running as art.

    My races this year, though were hard but were not anything new except for MMT, which we don’t talk about it. First off, my very first race, the Seneca Greenway 50k race was canceled due to weather (rain). Oh ya, the WTF race was also canceled due to ice and snow. It kind of dampened the mood. This came after the Devil Dog, which we won’t talk about that either. I did not run the Grayson Highland this year. Last year, that was my first scary race. I felt I reached another level after finishing it. Nothing like that this year. Also, this year I did not run Laurel Highland race, another fearsome race I successfully ran last year. This year though, I ran the Catoctin 50k the full race, and this was a race I am proud of. Yet a 50k is nothing compare to a 50 mile or 70 mile run. Last year, I only did the short version of the Catoctin Run and this year I got to do the real thing and so I am proud.

    The race that tested my mettle this year was the MMT (Massanutten 100). Indeed, it was hard and I did not finish it. I went in knowing it was hard, but as I ran, I was confident I could finish. Then a twist of fate, and I hit my limit near the very end. Definitely a story to tell. The report is available (MMT report, Day477).

    Forward looking, I signed up for many same races for the fall as last year. Iron Mountain and Lake Ridge 12 hr run, both were races I did last year. Iron Mountain is my next project and then Devil Dog, both are hard. Plus many other smaller races, e.g., Moonlight marathon, which I haven’t signed up yet, but I might, and it also was a race I did last year. I had more fun out of it than expected.

    Plus, I signed up the Devil Dog again, a redo because I did not get to finish it last year. This time I am running a longer distance. I will enter the fall and winter season in full speed. It might not be like last year when everything was new to me, this year, while challenging, they are things I have done before.

    What were my resolutions again? I don’t know, but I have many races to do. (Kick myself, stop being lazy and go look up my resolutions, OK, I did). It is my fault to make my resolutions too vague, that I can’t remember them. Not knowing them means I am not actively working toward reaching them.

    Note to self: Moonlight Marathon signup, Blue Ridge Marathon sign up, Tulsa Route 66 Marathon, maybe, and Ann Arbor Marathon, maybe.

  • Review 20.7.250* (Quarterly)

    Day 250 / Spring

    It is finally day 250. Thought it couldn’t come soon enough.

    I do a report or review for myself and those who only come read my stuff ever now and then. If you only want to catch up on what I have been doing in the last 3 or 4 months, this should be the entry to read. This page will be bookmarked on the bookmark page.

    If you want to see what going on 5-6 months ago, you can read my previous entry (19.6).

    I am debating between two different approaches, whether to do a strict review of what occurred between now day 200 and now, or do a snapshot of what life is currently like for me of this very moment. I am leaning toward the snapshot and like to digress into free-write. Here we go.

    The reason for doing any of this is to allow me to take a step back and see a bigger picture what my life is like. Sometimes we are focused on the much day to day, that we miss a bigger narative – or the interesting thing that is happening in our life. I hope and want my life to be meaningful. I hope by doing this I am a bit closer to reaching my ideal. I believe life has meaning and we are building on it day by day.

    As I was running tonight (last night now), the covid virus was heavily on my heart, since one of the pastors I know is infected (a good friend too). This stuff is serious. There is a chance the person might day. How that affect me? I might die from the pandemic too. We don’t want to think about that but it is a reality. Am I ready? Am I satisfied with the direction of my life?

    It is easy to say, I am not worry. I have been living out in full. But am I really?

    I can die happy because…of Chile.

    My high point this quarter was trip Chile with my best friend and did the things I only dreamed of twenty years ago (yes, that long). The trip though truly was horrible. I could have gone with a better companion, but it had to be her. She was mad at me the whole time – she had been mad at me for three months beforehand and it all culminated on this trip, where things boiled over – the tipping point as you would call it. Why couldn’t we resolve our differences? Life is strange. People are strange. That was the back current to what was the most unique experience I had. Do I know why she was mad? She told me much later after the trip but to this day, 6 months later, I still don’t get it. Some things are just too hard for me. Sometimes, there is just no solution.

    Yet the trip was also the highest point in my life for many reasons. It was such an unbelievable trip – it was like climbing Mt Everest for me. I didn’t write enough about it. (Patagonia). It is not so much what we did but what we experienced together. Traveling with friends indeed is so different from traveling alone. I am not exaggerating. I hope to do more of it and if the same person if fate allows. It is a hard call if I know what was going to happen beforehand, would I still go? I don’t know.

    Then there was one month (6 weeks) of no activities. I don’t think I wrote much about it. It was one of the worse depression in my life. I really did not train seriously until the end of January (week1). At the time too, my finance situation was near melt down. For the first time in my life, I was wondering if I have enough to pay my bill and where I can get food. I was worry that money wouldn’t come in for my rent and that the check would bounce! However, last three months I have been better at controling of my use of money and finally some breathing room before this coronavirus hit. There were several entries I wrote about no money to sign up for races! That’s big when I had to give up on running in a race.

    Luckily. I did run in one race in Carlsbad, California CarlsbadMarathon. It is a beautiful place. I went there for my cousin’s wedding and was able to do a race the next day. My outlook regarding life improved. During the trip, my friend who I went to Chile with, also called – we finally spoke to each other after 3 months (seriously I didn’t know).

    Most of the time after that was training and more training. I was supposedly to train for a series of ultras and marathons I would be doing starting next week to the beginning of summer (previous race plan). Many of these races won’t be happening any more. The DC Rock-n-Roll and the Blue Ridge Marathon are canceled. It was funny when I planned 5-6 months ou t, no one could imagine it would turn out like this. I did couple overnight training trips for the Laurel race (LH1, LH2, and LH3/4). Both times were in snow. Interesting learning experience.

    Ran my last utra before the corona COVID-19 thing got serious (SenecaCreek). I thought I wrote a report on the race, but didn’t. It was briefly referenced in my weekly run su mmary. I didn’t treat the ultra as a race but more like a weekend long run, hence no race report. Actually, the race was quite good. I should do a serious report on it.

    Finally, I did some planning here and there. Nothing too concrete. I did some ‘preaching’ to myself to motivate me. I think they are fun to read. I usually borrow my pastor’s material. I call them Faith-running, that is to turn my belief and apply them to running. (transformation, thoughts, vision/goals, and resolve )

    Am I on track with my goals? who knows. I wish I have a big master plan. I am more of living from day to day, month to month and year to year. Planning isn’t my strong suit.

    I do try to run a marathon in all fifty states (I have done 8 so far). I am only limited by time and money. I hope too in a few years to run across the US continent (I haven’t written about this). It is a bit ambitious and requires careful planning. I want to hike the whole Appalachian Trail too (thru-hike), and that will be in a few years. My progression into longer and longer races is going on well. I haven’t run a 100 miler yet, and looking to do one either at the end of this year or the next. I have a huge race calendar on a Google spreadsheet and have been ticking off a race here and there. My goal is to do what I can do when I still have strength. It is getting harder each year at my age (true!). Aging is a reality. So I hike, run, and push myself to the max, because someday, I won’t be able to do at the level I can do at the moment.

    What’s next? I hope the coronavirus won’t cause more cancelations of my races. Couple of my races in May an June are on the fence. Of course the Laurel race (70.5 mile race) in June will be my biggest race of the year. The next report will cover it if it ever take place plus some virtual runs I will be doing meanwhile.

    *meta: I changed my numbering system. 20.7.250 means 20 for 2020 the year, 7 is the 7th review since the beginning when I started writing a monthly/quarterly review, and 250 is my date numbering from day 1. It goes from the significant to less significant. The day numbering usually get lost because we are not that good at counting beyond 10. Soon too the number of reviews will get too big to be meaningful. But the year, that is something fun and our brain can zero in.

    Why adding in the date? It makes it looks mysterious. It is like a software version triplet.

  • Review 19.6

    Day 200 Fall Review

    My running season (7th) is finally over, with a cap of successfully completing the JFK. It has been an intense roller coaster ride. I went through the highest of high and lowest of low in my runs and in my personal life to get there.

    My last report from Day150, was from early August. Instead of a report of every 30 days, I lengthened to 50 days, so I don’t have to write too many reports. A monthly or bi-monthly report has become a seasonal report. My one year of blogging just passed and I reflected on that recenly.

    At the end of summer, I was ready for fall training for the JFK. I trained for about 9 weeks and then I don’t know what happen. I stopped. I still ran but I didn’t log my miles and basically went off the training schedule. Luckily I didn’t blew my JFK race. However, if I have kept to the schedule, I might have done better. I did well, but who knows how much better I could have done.

    I wrote a race report on the JFK. The ultras that helped me to train up to it were OldGlory and MCM50k. I also did the Baltimore Marathon and Morgantown. I had a good time in both. I did couple earlier marathons (C&O1 and Altis) in September, however, I did not enjoyed those as much as the ultras and Baltimore. I thought it was an intense season, but now looking back, it was just about right.

    When I was not running, I had several good backpacking trips. The whole season was a struggle between training and doing other things, which I also liked. Roan Mnt trip was pretty good. At Dolly Sods, our hiking group learned a good lesson. Our trips to Mt Pleasant (occurred in the summer) and to Wild Oaks were also memorable.

    This season, I struggled with many things: my diet was totally off. I struggled with staying on my training. I don’t have a record how many miles I ran (tracked only up to week 9). I don’t think it was that much, around maybe 300 miles. I was lucky, indeed, and did not DNF on my races. I was also struggled with schedule conflict between racing/training/and other commitments.

    There were always trade-offs and sacrifices. I had to cancel the High Bridge Ultra and plus a hiking trip to the Triple Crown — both had lasting effects that haunted me and I hate to have plan changed on me. One word on trade-offs, neither choice have the same value – say trading a race for a hike, or a hike for a race, may seem like doing the same thing, but is not. In life, I don’t think there is ever an equal/fair choice. I hurt those around me with my choices.

    I dealt with couple times of low spirit in this season and sometimes I skipped my runs, especially the short runs. In fact I am still in the thick of it; yelp, season is over, but I still think about running. I skipped some of my races – big ones too, first time ever. I had to dig deep to find and regain a motivation to run and to overcome the busyness to train; too many things happened, things at my job at work and my relationship with other people. And even my weight training program was stopped. Only constant theme though was pushing on. I finished the JFK at a great cost. The season was a longer version of the race itself, except there is no finish line to cross and no crowd there to celebrate and no medal to receive. However, I am satisfied that the goal was accomplished and that is a reward.

    Luckily I have been healthy throughout. I had short period of pain and shin splint and various ankle rolls and such, but over all was healthy. There was no injury serious enough to sideline me.

    Looking ahead, I scheduled quite a few races for next year. It will be just as intense season like this one. God is good!

  • 19.5 Review

    Day 150 Summer / review no 5

    [Last] month review (May) can be found here. Every time I write this, I feel like doing a project, except I have no idea what I am doing. I just feel it is right to write a report.

    This month/quarter had me twisted in a knot but finally everything sorted out. Well kind of.

    I ran couple of races. York Marathon in Pennsylvania and Eastern Divide (EDU) in Roanoke VA. And I thought, I was exhausted from those. I probably were.

    The big news was my doctor told me I have high cholesterol. I took the news like I was about to die. I started fasting. No more eating out, no more candy, no more soda. I started to lower my calorie intake. I fasted from food at least once a week, on every Monday and on first of every month. My friend taught me to cook. I wanted to eat healthier. I was handling fine. At least I thought so. It went on for about three weeks, until I began to get weak, very weak.

    I didn’t do less though. I kept to my running and camping. We went to Laurel Highland and I had a blast. It was one of those places I wanted to go for a long time.

    I got so weak though soon I was not able to run nor hike. People in my running group when they saw me begged me to go home. I persisted but soon I had to give into my body. I was no longer could run a four miler. Then even two milers were like running a marathon.

    I went to see the doctor, luckily he was quick to identify that I got Lyme disease. I was put on antibiotic and finally as of couple days ago, I finished the treatment. I regained my strength just in time for me to do the Jack&Jill marathon two weekends ago.

    I pretty much back to where I was, being strong again. Granted with almost two months off from my training, there are a lot to catch up. I canceled the 40 miler ultra for August. I am now focus on my September and October marathons. The next report will probably be about those races.

    I felt I have come a full circle. The training plan I had for the summer, well they had to be adjusted. It was pretty much toasted. Luckily not too many things were affected. I learned definitely where my limit is. If the body refuses to move, there really not a lot of way to force myself to do anything. I always believe mind over the body, but that only applies for short duration like during a race. It is much much harder to do it during a long illness. I got a taste of being not able to run. Really really not able to run at all when I was seemingly healthy (well I thought so was healthy at the time). I now believe people when they say they can’t run, they really can’t run. Now at least I got back a body that can.

    Finally, I can begin my summer training. It is not too late.

    Last: https://antin.blog/2019/05/14/19-4-review/

    York: https://antin.blog/2019/05/19/two-for-one/

    EDU: https://antin.blog/2019/06/15/race-3-eastern-divide-50k/

    Jill: https://antin.blog/2019/07/31/reflection/