In awe

Category: life

  • Xmas

    National Christmas Tree

    Our running group made a stop by the White House this past week to take photos of the National Christmas Tree. There were other smaller trees representing 50 states and territories. They are already posted on social media sites (not by me).

    Last couple weeks, I also visited other christmas trees in DC. My running friend Caroline joined me on the tree run and caroling night with the DC Tri, but caroling was just a click bait for Caroline because none of us sing Christmas songs.

    Those who found my other social media sites already saw some of the pictures. I’m doing better in “consolidating” or managing them. It tried anyway. I started twitter and IG. I restarted my tumbr. WP is still my main though because I like doing longer posts (journaling).

    Xmas trees at other places. Canadian Embassy, Capitol and Union Station

    It has been a quiet week. I did a recovery run (Naked Nick 50K) in Pennsylvania. Yes, I survived. I’m too tired to write a report. My friend Caroline drove me there. It was one of those first time trip going out of state with someone to run a race. Caroline loved it a lot. To me, somehow it was meh, a run. There were 500+ runners. The highlight of the trip was the ride there. We spent 7 hours in the car, and I ran for 7 hours. The run did what it did. It allowed me to “recover” my body and reset my mind.

    I did couple other runs and mostly on a treadmill. Nothing spectacular to write about. Maybe due to laziness, I used treadmill (we call it the dreadmill). After the 100 mile, I did not have much motivation to run. Hopping on the treadmill for 30-40 mins is the most I could do at the moment. It is also cold outside. Treadmill seems to be a better option.

    Winter Soltice has past. That means, each day should be longer. Apparently, it is a important festival for chinese. We had a family dinner. It is like Christmas – the focus is to spend time with family/friends.

    Some other news during the down cycle and I am excited about, I signed up three races! Two of them I mentioned in the last post. I signed up for Seneca Creek Greenway 50K (March), Shamrock Marathon at Virginia Beach (also in March), and Grindstone 100 (in September). I’ll give my reasons why I decided to run Grindstone in a later post. It is more than because they had a presale, so I jumped in. For now that is a good explanation, but I am excited all these.

    Peace on earth and good news to all. Merry Christmas!

  • Day521 I’m ok / 2022 race recap

    I have been recovering well the last two weeks. I just have nothing to blog about. I was thinking of doing some kind of highlight reel of my 2022, so here it is.

    It is also a time to pause, meaning what am I doing next. I know I have a bunch of races for next year. Nothing truly is challenging me except for the MMT 100 and possibly Teach’s Revenge 100 (OBX), though what I am excited about is the Toronto Marathon! Yes, I am thinking about racing all the time. I guess more to be revealed in future posts. Plus, I have a few vanity races such as Lake Tahoe, and maybe will do the CIM (California International Marathon).

    So much have happened in 2022. I had a great fall season! Nothing new here for those who kept up on my blog.

    I started up the year slowly, with a bunch of baggages. I was injured after last year Devil Dog, and I believe it sidelined me for at least 8 weeks. My mom was sick during November-December time frame that created ton of pressure in my family, resulted in a big dispute between me and my sister. I had hard time focusing as much as I tried to ignore the distractions. I tried to focus on the issue and not so much the emotional turmoils. Less talk/cry more work should be my motto. All in all, my spring training was delayed.

    Then I did manage a couple marathons in the spring, Newport News and Salibury. I was happy with my results though they were not my best time. I love those two races and they were on my list for a long time and finally was able to run them. I linked to their reports. Then I ran the Massanutten 100 (MMT) as I was returning to a good running shape. Though I did not finish the race, but it was the high point because it was a hard race and I gave it my best shot. It helped later in the year. MMT was supposed my A+ race.

    After MMT, I tried to reset quickly. During the summer, I trained and ran the Iron Mountain 50 (IMTR). It was also another high point to see if I could beat the course 12 hour time limit. I did not succeed but it was also a valuable lesson that I need to be better. And it propeled me into a strong fall season. I also ran Grandmas in Minnesota for fun. I had fun.

    There was no time to be upset about Iron Mountain. I was not much upset by it. A failed attempt is a failed attempt. Do better next time. Yes, I waited four years to run it, but there is always a next year. Iron Mountain was not an A race, but it was very close there, like a consolation prize. (I don’t really plan for B races).

    Things picked up fast in the fall. It was like I got an extra boost. I did a race almost every weekend. They were not hard per se but many were adventurous. I traveled to places like Ann Arbor and Atlantic City. They were places I have never been to. It is one of the reasons I like doing the 50 states marathons, to visit different places. There were many other races I did and they were all great, but they are just too many for me to remember and name them here. (I will try to find links to my spring plan, summer plan, and fall review and plan, where I mentioned some of them).

    A few of the races that stood out were the Stone Mill 50 and then JFK 50 and of course the Devil Dog 100. They were my biggest races. I could not imagine of even doing one, even last year much less all three together. I trained a whole season just for one event in the past.

    Devil Dog was the best because it was last and is in a league of its own. I can’t say enough. It was the most intense and most gratifying. My mind is blown away by it. I did finish and that probably made it a great year. It was as if I came back with vengence to redeem my last year failed attempt and the two earlier races of this year. I want to prove I can do it. It was a risky plan because the implication if I have failed again is huge and that was a reason I did not say anything about either the JFK or the Devil Dog, but I made a lot of noise about Stone Mill as a diversion.

    I still wish though to give a list of marathons I ran this year. Originally, this post was going to do it, but I got bored when I was about to get started. Maybe will leave this for another time. I ran maybe 5 or 6 of them. The list of all my races is somewhere on here or the internet, but I like to make some comments and reflection on them.

    Marathons do get easier now (this year). I did feel nervous when I ran Newport News, and other marathons but by the time I did the NCR (last one of this year), I was completely confident that I could finish. Even running a 50 mile is easier for me now at the end of the year than at the beginning of the year. My perspective shifted after completing the Devil Dog. I guess with trainings, the body can be conditioned to make the run seems easy.

    I still remember not long ago, I was thinking how could people run a two marathon distance in one day and I was amazed by that at the Roanoke Marathon where some runners signed up to do just that. I get exhausted just doing one. I know it is all about pacing, but still to my early days, it was impossible. I want to say 100 miles too is the same but I think, a 100 mile is a different beast. Spoiler: I will finally attempt doing a double marathon in Roanoke next Spring (already registered).

    Anyway, this weekend, if weather holds up, I will be doing a 50k “recovery” run (Naked Nick) in Pennsylvania. Should be an easy run. A race report will be available later. Question is can I do it? I don’t know. I only had two “runs” since my 100 mile race. When I said runs, they were more like a walk. OK we’ll see. Don’t ask why I signed up a race so close following my one hundred. I agree I am out of my mind sometimes.

    ps. or fyi. Seneca Greenway 50K registration opened two days ago. This is my favorite. Also I am thinking of fitting Shamrock Yuengling Marathon in my schedule. Yes, time for signing up more races when I have nothing to do.

  • Day519 lessons

    The Devil Dog is so much for me to debrief in a go. I might need some time, maybe some weeks later. It was a good race is all I got to say for now. Here below is an entry I wrote probably back in October (the airport trip) but did not get a chance to post.

    I am at the end of a long series of blog posts that started around at the end of summer. At first I did not mean for it to be a theme for the fall, but now fall is over, so I like to close it with this entry, to put a lid on.

    It all started when I had a lot of thoughts prompted by a friend of exactly why I love running (day502) and a lot of things were going on at the same time because I entered one of the busiest race schedule I have ever done my life. I tried to write them down as much as possible and saved them for later postings because I did not want to overwhelm the site with too many postings at once. There was a time I posted evert day, though now I try to keep to usually 2 posts, and maybe a third very short post, which usually announcing something I am very excited about, e.g., like the Waterfall 50K at the beginning of the year (WTF50).

    I entered the fall season with a bunch of races. There were too many for me to remember. I enjoyed going to Ann Arbor. And recently I went to Atlantic City. This reminded me that I should do a post, listing just all the marathons I did this year. I think I did about 6-7 marathons.

    I did a couple 12 hour/ 24 hour runs. I did the Iron Mountain and Rock n the Knob race. I love both of these races.

    Then there were a bunch of training runs for the Stone Mill 50. The final report already posted. Originally, this post was to be published first before that one. However, I was too excited about that race, and posted that one first.

    If you ask is there is a crescedo from all the races to a finale, the answer is maybe. This fall season is definitely something, unlike any previous year and I am not exhausted yet, and I hope I won’t burnout again like last year. I clearly remember by this time of year, I was. I have the Devil Dog coming up still but I am not sure if that will be the highest peak of this season. It will definitely be my hardest race this year other than MMT or Iron Mountain. These three races are the high points of this year (MMT in the late spring, Iron Mountian in the end of summer, and the Devil Dog at the end of fall (if we can still call it fall!) Maybe it will be a finale. I want it to be, but then who knows.

    If readers did not see the hypes leading up, that is fine. I have not been focusing too much on the Devil Dog. I was kind of keeping it at a low profile and hiding it in plain sight. That’s right. Because, I am afraid of running in this race.

    Now to the main topic, a few weeks ago, I asked myself whether there is a lesson in any of this. I kind of seeing a pattern from my running and writing reports of them.

    I had reread some of them whenever I write some reports that referencing to some earlier posts.

    In a way, I do know all what I have written but I am also so forgetful. To me, I am felt like drowning in the water called life, and from time to time I resurface and am able to breathe again. It give me a moment of clarity. Then I resubmerge in the world of forgetfulness again. This is not a lesson but an observation.

    I also note my work and recreation is also similar. Work is killing me. My weekend is what restore me. I do enjoy my work but often time it is a part of my life I don’t want to talk about. We work maybe 5 days a week and we have two days of rest. My weekend is like when I feel alive again. Specifically, running makes me feel alive.

    It is my fear that I will forget something like who I am and what I was doing. I have to write then down. There might be a brief moment of clarity in the middle of this. I tried to capture that. When I reread my own blog, I said yes, I remember now, that was what I was trying to do.

    It is funny how fast I forget thing. Sometimes when I reread my blog, it was like seeing things for the first time. And then the memories from the event start to reform.

    Also the stuff I write, sometimes they are repetitive. Maybe life is like that. We do things again and again. Maybe we go through a cycle. We often do not realize that. We have been there done that.

    When I reread my blog entries, I noted that I want every race to be uniquely special. And Yes they are. Sometimes, it is not really so significant, but I make as if they are the best race in the world. They were to me. This is my sixth (and maybe 7th) year since I started running (I lost count).

    This season, some races I have done them for the third time, like Rock-n-the Knob and many other races. There’s got to be some what different this time. I don’t know. Usually, I forget immediately after I have done them. I retain some vague memory. If a race is a repeat, the memory gets overlapped. I might mess up recalling which year is which. But thank to WP, my blog, things get recorded. It is fun for me to pull up a prior year race to do a comparison.

    Couple days ago I was thinking what all my races could teach me or improve me as a person. I threw my hands up. They don’t teach anything. Maybe I could beat them into something of a life lesson. Because I spent so much time thinking about races, I see my life too as a racing event. But I don’t like to think like that.

    Life is a race. We all running to somewhere trying achieve something. My bucket list items are like the Aid Stations on the course. Do I want to stop and get help or do I bypassing them? I hope I stop long enough to smell the roses.

    I feel my 9-5 job is like running too. I work without seeing the end of it. My weekend is my break or my aid station.

    I have been learning how to balance work and recreation. The time I spend at work, I don’t remember much. But the time I spend away from work is something I like to write about. All these posts here are what I do on the weekend.

    I don’t know if that makes any sense. Sometimes I run without reasons but when I read my blog, I then remember oh that is why I am doing it. I think when I write my blog, I try to give meaning to my races. It is part of story telling, but in truth, a run is just another run. I could do them mindlessly.

    Kind of an addentum: Other things that happened but I won’t write a post on, at least for now – I spent a weekend cleaning my room. Yes, I should do this every weekend. My roommate has moved out, and I kind of spending the time to rearranging the house and stuff. There are some long stories like we discovered a bee nest outside. I haven’t taken care to destroy the nest yet (I hate doing it because it didn’t bother me and bees are good insects, but my neighbor didn’t want the nest around).

    Yes, meh, I don’t like doing chores. Getting my room to be what I want it to be is a big deal to me. I felt I like ran a marathon.

    Second, the artists I supported on twitch have gone on a hiatus. This did affect my fall training in a good way. I guess I had more time to train. Why I brought it up is it has been a significant time and money sink. I was thinking to get some art for the house. This is open ended. I got some already but haven’t put them up.

    Third, my car has a recall where the gas tank could fall off. Yes I should have taken care of that during the last few months, but had not. These are the stuffs that were on my mind, yep, nothing related to running, but real life stuff.

    I guess I have to conclude the post somehow. Yes, these are real life stuffs I don’t want to deal with. Real life is messy. I like running and did a lot of them. Running is fun and simple. It was fun for the past season. There were a lot going on. We got through the fall season. The first post (on day 502) I had, I thought it was going be a brief interlude but many things since happened. Here we are.

  • Day516 Thanksgiving

    At Mile 19 Aid Station, the Frederick Steeple Chasers

    Happy thanksgiving! I know Canadians had it last month and other countries probably have it on a different date or some don’t have it at all.

    This day always slips by me so fast and that I am not quite ready to answer. The question is of course, what are we thankful for this year. It might be different for you.

    So much have happened! I have done a few looking back year end entries already such as my blog aniversary not long ago (link if I remember or not too lazy).

    Truly, it should be a day to pause and be grateful to our Creator — first of, a reason for being alive. Also it should be a time look at the meaning or purpose for our life. Further, we should be appreciative of life and the bountiful harvest of the year. I do acknowledge our pluralistic society. One can show appreciation toward life in other ways.

    While running the JFK the past weekend, it occured to me, I was able to run it and I should not take it for granted. It was so simple. I was able to enjoy my run and that was a blessing.

    The purpose of the race was not to see how fast we could do a 50 mile – I think the first place finished it in 5 and half hours. It took me almost twice as long. Time is important, but simply to be able to run it was an honor. I know a friend who ran this 8 times but this time did not finish under the time constraint, still it was an achievement for her to finish it regardless if it is under 13 hours or not.

    The reason I was able to run it was a testament of being healthy. I wish I could run even faster, but they were saying how many people out there can run a 50 mile in one go! I did two 50 mile races on a back to back weekend. And I hope to do more this weekend and the next! I’ve reached a level a few years ago I would only dream of. I know I won’t be here at this peak for long.

    Yes I am being thankful for good Health. Also during the run and it was such a long run. It brought to mind, like I wish I could get to heaven where everything is well and not more problems and such. Then I quickly came to realize that it is impossible. We can’t rush the divine time table. Like with my race, I know I would eventually get to the end. All I got to do is run my race.

    Of course, we should be thankful for being able to breath, and do the things we enjoy. Things we can only do when we are alive!

    Also, I had few friends who came out to support me! The first year, they were spectators and this year they ran along side of me. It was such a joy when they could come along and got the full taste of the ultra running experience!

    There were a few other people I know on the course. Caroline, Trevor, Billy, Gretchen and so forth.

    I was not trying to be mr. popular, but having people recognized me gives that validation, that I exist and I mean something to them. Caroline is a great friend who always reaches out to me and sharing with me her life story! There were a few others from the MMT community who are also very personal and endearing!

    Similarly during the race, when I saw a runner in a funk, I told them, I see them and I am running with them through their lows.

    I know someone who one said to me “I appreciate you!” and it just made my day. I can’t make a worldwide impact at once, but I if I can make a person cheer up, that will be enough! I told the runner, I see you! I don’t care if the runner then suddenly catch a second wind from my encouragements and then beat me to the finish. I have been in the lows too.

    The year was not without troubles. I had setbacks, setbacks in my relationship with others, with my career, with my finance, and with my running. Especially with my running! I DNF’d three times (Devil Dog, MMT, and Iron Mountain). They left a hole in my heart. Oh, I am being dramatic! But it is true, sorrow does leave it marks. I compared myself to others. Why did that person is able to do it and I couldn’t? I can tell myself I will get stronger next time, but what if I can and won’t? Oh big woof, and too bad, some people tell me to get over it. I am thankful for the harsh critics too.

    I guess, I have to be thankful for setbacks too. It humbled me. I am not always strong. I couldn’t always win. When I do and when I finish the race, it made it all so satisfying.

    Because it means qualitative growth! I sometimes ask myself, have I improved at all? I could speak of running! I am getting slower and slower each year and it is heartbreaking to ask have I improved? JFK50 shown how my experience in my ultra running helps me finish the race. I was lucky to get a PR, but what more satisfying was realizing the experiences I gained from my previous failures.

    There will be many more reasons to be thankful of and I will ponder them as I spend time with my family over the holiday. Yes, some will ask, why I am always talking about running even with the thanksgiving! it is because…well let leave it at that.

    Enjoy your thanksgiving!

  • Day510 Happy Friday

    Another week! The year is drawing to a close. There are a few more weeks yet. I have one more race, well two, no a few more.

    I plan to do two races this weekend. Nothing big, but will (maybe) report on it next week — don’t want to jink it yet and also I don’t have the right feel for it (I see them as one event)…though likely I will do them. I paid for them, so gotta run them. I am not in a burnout mood like last year. I just finally felt I could breathe after a stressful time back in October.

    The two real races left for the year is Stone Mill next weekend. I have been training week after week. I’m not worry. This race is one I am expecting to be fun, at least to me.

    Then there is the Devil Dog that I have been avoiding in my blog. One day I will face it. It is coming by fast (less than a month out). I haven’t trained specifically for it. No plans. Nothing. Yet the Devil Dog is scary. Let leave it alone for now.

    This weekend as of last year 2021, I was about to do my 100 mile run Rim to River in West Virginia. It was that race that brought me back alive. Now it seems ages ago.

    Gotta go now. Unlike last year, this weekend will be low key. I am ‘tapering’ as I get ready for Stone Mill.

  • Day509 TR4 – Halloween

    What a weekend! In a bad way. I worked over this weekend so i’m kind of dead (a zombie) now. There’s no partying for me tonight. Certainly absolutely there was no party over the weekend. I’m boring. My mom wanted to kipnap me to celebrate my birthday, but I escaped. Oh there was the MCM, Marine Corps Marathon, but I deferred it, so no, I won’t say anything about that, except lucky runners had such a beautiful race. MCM probably will be my tradition birthday run some day. Yes, next year.

    I also did my training run over weekend. It was the last run before the race. What race? The Stone Mill 50.

    This race originally was not too special. I did my first 50 miler at end of 2019. My first attempt of Stone Mill was in 2020, during the pararoma. My grandma passed away while I was running it. Last year, I did not plan to sign up but I believed after attending one of the training runs, I got hooked and did a quick sign up before the race, ah I remember, the friday of, they didn’t even have my bib ready (or at least the volunteer couldn’t find it)! Last year on this day my mom was in the urgent care (Kaiser) after suffering a stroke (she has completely recovered now). So this race now has a bit of personal history, both sadness and celebration!

    This year I am happened to recruit two of my friends to run this. It will be two weeks from now, so knock on wood nothing will happen to us. My friend David probably gave up (deferred) his NY Marathon entry to run this. I am touched. I truly believe he can do both (like on back to back weekends). This guy could finish a 50 mile under 10 (while I am trying to beat 12 hours). He seemed modest in his approach but if I were him, I run both.

    The other guy Alex also super athletic. He said he won the age group award in a race. He probably could run it under 10 hours too.

    I don’t really need to do a training run myself but I know if I don’t go to them, I am too lazy to train on my own.

    So it is the end of the month and our company needs to close its book, which means a lot of work for all as we try to get everything done and recorded for this month.

    I was stressed out. But on Saturday, I showed up bright and early at the trailhead with several other people. This week run was long but the number of people coming out was fewer than previous weeks since there were two 50K races happening this weekend in our area. Most of the guys (and gals) normally came out were in those races. I, in fact, contemplated running one of them (PB&J 50k and the Patapsco 50k).

    The weather was beautiful. We went from around 35F to 65F during the day. I really wanted to be back out the next day to do it again.

    I put in 20 miles plus 5 mile hiking around Cloper Lake (I renamed it as Seneca Lake). The run itself, I was not putting too much effort into it. I was kind of the last guy in the pack. Mostly because my mind was occupied by work.

    I so happened to roll my ankle, because my mind was else where. First the left, then the right, and then the left again. Finally, while hiking, I really put too much force and I rolled it the third time on my left and boy was that painful.

    First time, didn’t hurt. Second time, hurt a little. Third, it was ouchie ouchie limping pain. I walked it off. Now they are better, but still there is a bit of soreness.

    Sunday, I did not go back out. It was a beautiful day. Here are some pictures.

    On the Seneca Ridge/Greenway Trail and at the Seneca State Park, where I will run a 50 mile race in November

    We hope we will have such nice weather on race day. Enough with all the training runs. Happy Halloween!

  • Day507 Hello World

    Happy blog anniversary! This is my fourth year on the platform. I started around 2018 (first Hello).

    I looked back the previous hello world entries, and last year was kind of thick (I said a lot in that entry).

    Hello World is my way of starting a new blogging year of finding or determining what I will write in this new season.

    No surprises, I will be doing the same as I have been doing — that is I plan to run a lot and write about them. I already planned out for the next year. I haven’t signed up for races yet but I am likely going to do those races. (mentioned in day496)

    This next year will be like the past few years. I will make moderate improvements in challenging myself to be at the next level. There is one secret – I plan to go oversea…no not exactly over the ocean – just to Canada. We will see if I could pull it off. (race schedule)

    meta – I changed the layout of the site because I was tired of finding fixes for the twentytwentytwo theme that has been messing up the site. I concluded that the things I needed to do would require me to get a business level plan from WP to have access to the CSS layering in order to disable the default title/tagline/images.

    keeping my entry brief this year – signing off.

  • Day504 Oil Change – A slice of life

    Disclaimer: This post might might give you a foul mood. I was debating whether to post it or not, since it is off topic or one I don’t enjoy writing because I come across as fussy and complaining.

    Several things happened that kind of put me off balance (this happened a few weeks ago). I am going tell one of them. I already forgot what other things were since I did not write them down. I do remember this. I hope I can keep my thoughts organized for me to retell.

    I took my car in for an oil change. I just finished paying off my car loan this summer and was planning to do my own oil change from now on to save some money.

    I have been using professional service center for oil changes. I know it costs a lot more but I would have a peace of mind that my car was taken care of and had best resell value for the bank if possible. I am joking right? No. I just love my car and the previous owner also treated it special.

    It so happened I have been out every weekend (to run) and did not get a chance to do the oil change myself. I decided then just go to an oil change place I have been going all these years and have them do it for me. The mileage has passed 8000 miles and was reaching 9000 and I was afraid I would burn the engine if I didn’t replace the oil soon. The reminder sticker recommended every 5000 miles. I was panicking that I was ruining the car.

    I received a big bill as usual because I always requested to have everything recommended done. The techician then brought over the dipstick to show me they did a good job except, she also commented the oil on the stick was somewhat of a dark color and not the light clear caramel color as it should be and recommended me to ask for an engine flush at the next oil change for $100. This was kind of a fairwell to me as if I would accept it.

    However, I wanted to ask if they did really change my oil but held my tongue because I was worried that my car actually needed an engine flush and I wanted to have one done right away.

    Looking back, this might be their way to hook me in spending more money or guilt tripping me that I did not bring it in at the 5000 mile mark. Why was I not told about the engine flush earlier when I came in and I wanted a flush to be done right now. I was willing to pay whatever price to have my car declared good. However, I felt my sale person wanted me out of the shop. It was a tense moment.

    I never heard of an engine flush before (I had, but at that time I did not remember). The gears in my mind started to spin. I am npt an engineer but I have an inclination toward how things work. You can’t pull things on me. If I don’t I will study until I feel I think I am an expert. I’m one of the those armchair generals. If there is something wrong, I would get to the bottom of it. Google is my friend.

    to me a flush is when you empty and refill it. Maybe doing two oil changes in a row, fill and drain and repeat. Simple physic would clean out anything. If you try to sell something to me, you have to talk physic and engine.

    Trying to avoid getting to an argument, I decided to leave. I was concerned about the car and I was about to drive to a nearby auto part store to pick up some motor oil and redo the oil change myself because I got an impression they did not change my oil at all and I did not trust this person who might be pulling my legs with an engine flush thing.

    I did not want the same crew to do a second oil change for me. They sensed I was a bit upset. Surely I was. I was triggered and about to lose it.

    After some googling, I found out an engine flush is what oil change places try to upsell. For $100, they will pour some additives into the engine that cost about maybe $20-30 if I do it myself. It will clean out the gunks in the engine and then flush them out during the oil change.

    No car manufactures would recommend this type of service. It also mentioned the same in my car manual of not to add any addictives to the engine. The reason being, it might get the dirty stuff to lodge deeper into the engine and damage it. Also the additives might eat away the engine rubber seals and gaskets and cause an engine leak, which is many times worse than the original problem. My car is out of warranty, but I would not risk it.

    Many attested that doing this on an old engine would result in a leak soon. The bottom line is, I do not want it. The consensus is to only do it if I brought a secondhand car and was doubtful if the previous owner has been upkeeping it. My previous owner took care of the car well (I know the owner) and so have I been good to my car.

    Then I was wondering back, did they really change my oil? Often times I went to this service station, they would do a bunch of free check ups, like lights, brake, fluids, tire pressure etc. This time I clearly saw the technician clicking on the computer screen as done without doing the actual checks. I did not say anything at the time, thinking they will get back to it later to do them.

    I know because when they do the check, they would actually call out what is being done. Left signal light, right signal right, pressure good, brake good etc. They would ask you to step on the brake or turn on the light. It is interactive with the driver as well as with their other staff. I know it is part of the show to make you feel like being a race car driver at a pit stop. They do this each time except this time.

    The one who was helping me, was talking to me all the time at the computer terminal. The other staff was servicing the car next to me. No other staff was nearby. There were no calling out from the pit crew beneath us, though she was talking to them on something unrelated the whole time. The below deck crew was doing something (rear diff for my car, will get to that later).

    At first I was puzzling. Note, I came maybe an hour before closing, so they seemed to be slacking and wanted to close the shop soon. I didn’t want to attack their character, you know always give them the benefit of the doubt.

    And I wanted two other services done beside the oil change. Maybe that was too much for them. This is also a lesson to self, do one thing and one thing only. This way I can be sure they have done it. If I asked too many things, I would get them confused or forget to do some of them but will charge me all the same.

    I wanted the rear differential fluid replaced and the transfer case fluid replaced. The representative checked the computer log and told me they would do the rear differential but I don’t need to change the transfer case fluid. This irritated me, because I know what my car needs but who am I to argue with a mechanic.

    This is also a lesson to their representative, to listen to their customer. Instead, the representative kind of treated me as if I did not know better and that their computer is correct. I bet next time I go there, the reminder for transfer fluid would come up. They did not ask me if I still wanted the transfer case fluid replace. I felt a bit miffed already.

    This somehow brought to mind of a previous visit. I told them I don’t trust their computer recommendations because I found it to be wrong in a previous visit.

    I started telling them how their computer recommended for me to replace the front differential fluid in my car one time when my car doesn’t have a front differential, but I didn’t know at the time and I went ahead and let them to replace it. They did amazingly!

    It had a note in their system to call the manufacturer for the right oil type. However, they could not find the answer of what oil to put in, whether it was VTM-4 or VTM-5. The mechanic from below believed it should be VTM-4, but the counter staff was not sure. Later on they decided to go with VTM-4.

    Just because their computer said I needed a front differential they would give me one even if they couldn’t locate it in my car or the oil type for it. Looking back, it was so crazy. Just because the computer says it is there, they really thought it was there.

    At the time, I told them I trust them whatever they put in is right because they are supposed to be the professionals.

    Later, I googled on my own which oil should be used for my front differential. People in an online forum were saying my car model though has a front differential but it is part of (or inside) the transmission and does not need a separate fluid change!! If a change is needed, they would need to disassamble it and should use the same type as my transmission fluid not any VTM stuff.

    I was about to explode when I read that. So then what oil did they replaced it with for my baby? If they poured rear differential fluid into my transmission (or any where near the front differential, I would cry. I would need to do a transmission flush and the whole nine yards or else my transmission would be damaged and need an expensive replacement job. I couldn’t believe they pull a wool over my eyes. That time I just brought the car for a lot of money.

    In the end their corporate reached out to me after I express my big concern on an “anonymous user/performance survey” they sent me a few days later to see if I was happy with their service and they got to hear an earful that I was not happy. The corporate got the store manager to call me immediately on my phone. It was nice to know the survey was not as “annonymous” as I thought.

    I was surprised how fast they acted. They said they got it on video of the whole transaction and assured me they did not pour VTM fluid into my transmission. If I wanted to come into the store to see the video myself, I could. The video showed they replaced the rear differential fluid and not the front differential fluid, which was a relief to me though billing me for the front differential fluid service.

    I caught them redhanded. Note, they didn’t apologize for their blatant mix up or how they would correct this. This was not an unintentional mixed up! They confirmed they did not pour VTM fluid or any other fluid into my transmission. They offered me a free oil change on my next visit. Note, I did not ask them to refund me the difference in price between the front and rear differential. They probably would say they both costed the same amount.

    At the time I was more than mad. They lied to me about the service they did and did not do the service they were supposed to do or billed me for. It was a multitude mixups on their part — and outright fraud because it was not jist one staff in on it but whole crew. It was blatantly lying to customers (not tiny white lies). They could have gotten out when they couldn’t figure out which fluid to use and any one of their staff could have said my car doesn’t have that part. It was unbelievable.

    I was ranting at the store again this time about their computer being wrong. I tried to not blame the staff. I know they tried to do their best and I came in and found fault with their system. The point I tried to make is I don’t trust their conputer system (or their sale associates). They should listen to their customers for once.

    Real engineer is knowing the real parts on the actual car and not some phoney computer. Seriously, their staff needed training too both on the mechanic aspect as well as customer relationship.

    Of course, they gave me a free oil change amd all were forgiven and they fixed their computer so it no longer prompted their service staff to offer me to do fluid replacement for the particular part my car doesn’t have.

    While telling this story to lady, I was not sure of they actually get to my oil change. The sale person was inexperience. To the person I was just an angry boomer. She was a female (though I never doubt a female couldn’t do car work — my mom knows how to do an oil change). However, in telling this story, I got on their bad side.

    The technician made a great deal this time of calling in to my car manufacture to be certain what type of differential fluid to replace with. I think she totally missed my point. In her mind, I was the customer who gave a bad review on a previous visit of blaming them of using the wrong fluid. So this time, the attention was totally on the rear differential fluid. The oil change and the transfer case I asked for was completely forgotten.

    They were trying to appease me and patronizing me except they missed a bigger picture — that is, they need to take care of my car.

    As I was wondering whether I should do my own oil change just to feel at ease with myself in case they did not replace my oil, I google searched what color the oil my dipstick should be after an oil change. I went and did a pull on the dipstick check myself the next day and found the color looked perfect to me. The color of the oil in my car looked fresh. What was all this talk about having an engine flush! I felt being lied to a second time whether intentionally or not, I don’t know. Or truly it was the technician first day on the job and never looked at a dipstick before. Why even commented that the oil looking a bit dark is puzzling!

    Additional info I later found, that I have been using full synthetic oil for the past five years on this car, which could last for 15,000 miles between each oil change. I did not know this at the time and thought it was way over due for an oil change and was played into their fear. However, I usually take it in at halfway by around 8000 miles. Of course, the service station recommended at an even shorter interval of 5000 miles or less. I normally wait until my car prompt me (my car has a timer for oil change). People’s car only have dark color oil if they drove it for too long way past due without having an oil change, but I have been taking mine in regularly for oil changes always on schedule. There is no need for an engine flush.

    I was relieved that even if they did not do an oil change, my previous oil can still last for another 7000 miles.

    Second, full synthetic oil has additives that are almost the same as those an engine flush stuff. Exactly why are they recommending me to do an engine flush when I am already using full synthetic oil? Unless they did not put full synthetic oil in there? They should know this at least and not try to sell me engine flush.

    If they speak engineering stuff with me, I would accept it. Exactly, because of the drama, I plan to do my own oil change next time.

    Should you take a car to those lube places? If you can’t do your own fluid replacement, then definitely. However, if you know how to service your own car, then it depends if you can trust your mechanic. In my situation, though I go to the same shop, but different persons service my car each time and I never get to meet the pit crew (those below the deck who actually do the work). It was so happened this time I was there, the shop manager was not on duty (because it was Sunday). Many of the usual things they do were skipped and the quality of my visit was not good.

    PS. Sorry if this comes across rant-ty. Sometimes, things just get me frustrated and I need to let off some steam.

  • Day502 reflection

    TLDR – reflection on why I love running. This topic comes up from time to time, and it might not have been my first time thinking through it

    While driving my friend to the airport over the weekend, my friend asked me a question I think deserves a good answer. She was someone I haven’t talked to since the beginning of Pararoma (coded). Actually, we might have stopped communicating since I started running about 6 years ago.

    During the trip to the airport, She asked an important question of why? Why do I run or why I love running so much? Or maybe why my love of running is more than spending time with my friends and family. Why I place running above so many things? Not sure if it was just a small talk conversation to avoid the silence, but it got me thinking.

    I kind of have an answer and not really. I think probably the heart of the matter is similar to the question Jesus asked Peter, Do you love me more than these (referring to Peter’s career as a fisherman), when Jesus reaffirmed Peter’s love after the betrayal and ressurection. My mom often tells me the same thing — to help me realize I shouldn’t make running as my life goal but that the love of God is. To me more and more, running is my purpose and calling.

    The simple reason is I love it. Other reasons follow. If I don’t run, what else would I be doing?

    Before I started into running, I spent my time for other things as watching movies and Japanese anime, and doing computer stuff or collecting music. I did run back then doing a mile here or there but never spent money on the sport!

    I was a quiet person, and still am. I used to spent my weekend programming things and installing software. It was what I liked to do. It is like stripping down a car and rebuilding it back up. However, after I discovered about running, I don’t really have time for those other activities. I gave up on doing stuff on my computer. I only touch a computer because I needed to schedule my races or track my growth, nothing more.

    I also run because I need it to train for a harder race. It is circular reasoning. I run so I could run more like doing a 200 mile race, or crossing Tennessee for real or even doing a Forest Gump style crossing the country USA. I do usually run so I can keep on running. Nothing scared me more than signing up for a race…because it means months of training. Fear is a big motivator for me.

    Running, gets me to reflect on things. It is my meditation time. I would not want to give this up. For some reason, maybe running is the only time I am away from everything, my work, responsibilities, worries and concerns. Usually if possible I am away from civilization. Sometimes, I stop carrying a phone. Maybe it is only time I could slow down. I know not many have this kind of luxury.

    Running shouldn’t be the time to hit the pause button, but life is so busy. I always felt not able to catch up. Running somehow becomes my only time to stop and be isolated for a good time. I feel so much being recharged coming back from my runs.

    Meeting with my friend brought up a lot of thoughts especially what if scenarios if I had not found running. Where had my six years of life gone? My long 9 hour race the next day gave me enough time to cool down. This was just one example why I needed running. Maybe I am using running to cope with life’s complexity.

    Note, they usually are not a problem, but sometimes things in life have a way of asking why not this way or not that way. Running let me sort them out and true, to forget them too. After my run, I felt so much better.

    Yes, I could be better at using my time and energy in other things like how to be better at making more money or how to improve myself. Why running is better than a million other things? That I don’t know. We each have a very limited amount of time available. We all have to make intentional decision how we use it.

    I could just run one or two marathons each year now with minimal effort (short training cycle). However, if I want to do trail marathons (100 miles and such) I need to put in that big commitment. The bottom line is is it worth it?

    There were many things I enjoy on my run such as being outdoor, being with friends, and being able to celebrate with other accomplishments.

    Also for me, if readers haven’t realized, I like to plan things and see things fall into places. Running allows me to test my planning skills. I don’t claim to be the world best planner, but it is something I have control over. I love it. It allows me to be foolish and try so many “new” ideas out there. It is like an ocean for me to explore. Things relating to a race have to work perfectly down to the minute and hour and every mile so on. I like being an “expert” on my body to to push it to perform. I call it self hacking.

    True, my mom always say I am not an robot, there is a limit. I know. She always tell me to run just one or two marathons a year, but I would do it every weekend if I have the means. She would read me news of people who died while running a marathon, including the first Greek guy. I would say, the first guy allegedly ran over couple hundred miles from Athen to Sparta (and back) and not just 26.2 miles from the city Marathon to Athen as most believe (well there are several versions of the story). Marathon distances used to break me too, but now they are considered a short distance to me because I believe I could run more than a marathon.

    What is my limit? I think it can be stretch. I hope to reach deep. I told my mom, my true goal is to do a 200-mile. She wanted to spank me (jokingly). My mom does not want me to hurt myself. I am sure I won’t. It is very hard to “break” the body by running. There are many things that can hurt me, but running is not one of them. I’m a softie, but I believe running won’t break me.

    My conversation with my friend made me feel sad (reflective) in a good way. It was weird how fast time flies. I knew her back in 2014, 8 years ago. Things have changed now. It made me reflect on several other friends I had somehow I were very close these eight years and how they changed as well and probably one of the few that remains as friends.

    The question then, do I ever regret getting into running. I could have been a very different person if I had not found out about running. I don’t think I am regretting it. I enjoy running as it is and the new friends and culture I was led into. I might have been a weirdo, maybe I still am, but my running friends have become my community. I am less weird.

    Can I stop running one day? Probably, but why, right? One joy I have while being out on the trail over the weekend, was I am glad I don’t have family to tie me down. It was the joy of being free. I don’t need someone’s permission. I can have every weekend being out on the trail. These last 6 years have been my most free and satisfied time in my life. Family is good, and I understand it is not an either-or option. It is that I have one less thing being responsible for.

    So when asked why do I run, I just do and I enjoy it. I could tell a long history like this, or simply I love it. There were many other answers or reasons but I think I simply love running.